Sunday, July 22, 2012

My Movie Reviews

Batman: The Dark Knight Rises

I saw the new Batman movie yesterday.  WOW.  It was so good.  I liked the other two, but wow.  This one was amazing.  Everyone applauded when it was over and how often does that happen?  I don't want to say anything except get your butts to the theater and see it.  It's like 90% action and it is very realistic and scary, so I was on the edge of my seat a lot of the time.  I was smacking Logan saying "Did you see that?  Oh my gosh!"  My jaw was dropped sometimes. Logan loved it too and he was excited that I did too.  Of COURSE I like Batman better than Superman.  I take what I said a few days ago all back.  Batman is bad.  He is the coolest, hands down.  And the Batmobile can fly, so Superman has nothing on him.  I want one of those Batcycles.  Those things are awesome.  I can't say anything else because I don't want to spoil it, but be prepared to sit a while.  I had to pee for the last hour of the movie, but I held it because I didn't want to miss anything.  Don't drink anything.  I am really sad that Christopher Nolan is finished, but he left on a high note.  They always say to leave when you're on top.....  


Magic Mike

You will have to call me or text me for this review.  I can't possibly write about that movie because, well,  just can't.  All I can say is that Channing Tatum was even hotter than we all expected and we were screaming at times.  There were about four silver-haired ladies in the theater that got up and left, but they were all laughing and I heard one say "Oh my gosh!  That was terrible!"  It was pretty funny.  Channing Tatum is, uhhhhhhh, it's sort of unreal.  

To Rome With Love

Thursday night we saw "To Rome With Love".  It's a Woody Allen movie.  It was actually pretty funny.  It's about fame and sex and what people will do for it.  We are all sell outs, according to this film.  Allen makes fun of the fact that you can be famous for doing absolutely nothing, just existing.  I loved that because it's so true nowadays.  Like that stupid Tia Tequila or whatever her name is.  Why is she famous?  No reason at all.  Alec Baldwin made me laugh.  He totally reminds me of my dad.   

I am driving back home today, so please say prayers for good weather and safe travels.  I wasn't so lucky on the way here, getting caught in a horrible storm where trees were yanked from the ground and signs were flying around.  It was very scary.  

Have a great Sunday!





Saturday, July 21, 2012

Starbucks and their Siren

I have a confession to make.  I have been buying Starbucks for years and I never noticed that the logo was a  siren.  All I saw when I looked at the logo was a group of green geometric shapes, the lack of space between the shapes, and the word Starbucks.  The logo, to me, meant "YAY!  COFFEE!"  It wasn't until about two months ago, when I was washing my thermal Starbucks cup, that I noticed the mermaid.  Now it's all I can see.  My mom thinks it's crazy that I never noticed it and I don't deny it.  At least I am not alone though; my step-dad didn't notice it either. 

Maybe the words detracted from the siren?
This is the one that is on my cup.  Maybe I only noticed it because the words aren't there?


They do a lot of studies on logos and images and I know that some things become ambiguous to the brain because they are seen so many times.  I think that this thing with my brain and the Starbucks logo is just a glitch in the Matrix.



This is what Starbucks has to say about their logo.  Pay attention to the last paragraph.  I have chosen to highlight it, proving that I may not be the only one who was clueless.  Maybe they realized that you couldn't tell what she was?:


"Let’s go all the way back to 1971, to when Starbucks was first coming to be. In a search for a way to capture the seafaring history of coffee and Seattle’s strong seaport roots, there was a lot of poring over old marine books going on. Suddenly, there she was: a 16th century Norse woodcut of a twin-tailed mermaid, or Siren. There was something about her – a seductive mystery mixed with a nautical theme that was exactly what the founders were looking for. A logo was designed around her, and our long relationship with the Siren began.
Over the last 40 years we’ve made some changes to that identity. Now we’re doing that again, to keep ourselves relevant as we evolve without ever losing sight of our heritage. But the Siren has always been there. She is at the heart of Starbucks.
Here we are today. Our new evolution liberates the Siren from the outer ring, making her the true, welcoming face of Starbucks. For people all over the globe, she is a signal of the world’s finest coffee – and much more. She stands unbound, sharing our stories, inviting all of us in to explore, to find something new and to connect with each other. And as always, she is urging all of us forward to the next thing. After all, who can resist her?"



One last note.....


Now I realize that this isn't exactly the same thing because it is intentionally clever, but what do you see when you look at this old Milwaukee Brewers logo?  I always saw a baseball mitt and ball.  Do you see the M and the B?  One of the best logos ever and they replaced it.  I don't get that.  They even used a ball for the hole in the B  I love that!

They know their beer and their logos.....


Have a great day!


Friday, July 20, 2012

Flashback Friday-You're Not Lost

I am reading "I Feel Bad About My Neck And Other Thoughts On Being A Woman" by Nora Ephron.  The title is pretty self-explanatory.  This book is hilarious to me, even though my neck is still youthful and I'm not blind as a bat like an old person.  In fact, it serves as a reminder for me to enjoy the few years that I have left with my youth and to appreciate such things like not having to wear reading glasses and pluck grey hairs.  Anyway, I am reading the chapter called "Blind as a Bat".  She talks about being lost on the road and it reminded me of something.

A lot of people really hate being lost.  I don't particularly like not knowing where I am, but I also don't panic, and there's a reason why.  I know that it isn't rational, but it tricks my brain and I shall share it with you now......

My friend, Kellie, was driving up to Atlanta to see me a couple of years back.  She reached the city and somehow got lost.  I was trying to guide her, but she was caught in traffic on top of being lost and she seemed distraught, so I shared with her something that I always find comforting.  I said the following:

"Kellie, you're not really lost.  You're still on Planet Earth."

I could tell that my words of wisdom didn't make her feel any better because she didn't say a word.  I broke the silence by saying "Don't you feel better?  You're never really lost and you will always find your way because there are only so many places you can be on Planet Earth."  She said "No, Brittany.  When I am stuck in rush hour traffic and lost in Atlanta, it doesn't make me feel better to know that I am on Planet Earth."

Well, I didn't say that it worked for everyone, and obviously it wouldn't work in every situation.  I'm sure that I would be singing a different tune if I were on an island alone or in the ocean about to be eaten by sharks.  But if I see signs and people and roads and land, I know I am on Planet Earth.  There's always some hope if you aren't floating off into space.  

Sometimes I wonder if I should stop admitting these things.








Thursday, July 19, 2012

Twin Talk

If you read my blog you might get the feeling that I am not a very tolerant person.  I assure you that this isn't the case.  I am extremely patient and tolerant of others.  I am not usually rude to people, but this blog is a place where I can talk about my thoughts and because I admit what they are, I can come off as not very nice whereas someone who isn't posting the things that irritate them on a daily basis can come off nicer than they really are.  I am me and I choose to admit the things that pass through my brain.  Whether this is a good idea or not, I suppose I haven't found out yet.  I am going to tell you about something that I laugh about internally and then you can decide whether I am mean or not.....

I have two sets of twins.  This draws a certain degree of attention every single place that I go, every day of my life.  My friends can vouch for this and I know without a doubt that they would say that I answer everyone with patience and kindness.  I neither hate nor love answering questions about my children, my ovaries, how long it took me to get pregnant, how long I carried them, how big they were at birth; it's my normal.  I laugh along with people and thank them genuinely when they tell me that I look great for having two sets of twins because it's truly sweet and I seriously appreciate the compliment, although I will admit that I secretly laugh because apparently I should weigh what a whale weighs.  I learned how to navigate my way through these questions with grace and a smile, even though they are very personal questions, when I had Logan and Lindsey.  I was twenty years old without a ring on my finger, so not only did I get the questions, but I also got my serving of judgment, pity, and the condescending advice.  It's now such a part of my life, I don't really think about how strange it is to get interrogated everywhere I go.  I am also older now and I have TWO sets, so no one dares to give me advice unless I ask because they know that they have never had two sets of twins....that has been a blessing.  

The first questions that I always get are whether the kids are identical or fraternal, and whether or not I was on fertility.  First of all, the latter is a very rude question and one that I am only willing to overlook because mine were natural and I didn't have to drop a million dollars in order to have them and I am not considered "defective", which is what someone is wanting to know when they ask such a rude question.  Right?  They are essentially asking if there is something wrong with your body, not to mention, they are asking about your financial stability.  (I hate this question because I have friends who are neither defective nor rich who have had to use fertility.)  I will have you know that people who ask this question don't discriminate.  Even when I was 20, people asked if I was on fertility in order to have Logan and Lindsey.  Um, why would I be on fertility at 20?  I always wanted to say "Yeah, I just couldn't wait any longer after high school!  I ran straight from my graduation ceremony to the fertility clinic to freeze my eggs!"  I looked like a baby when I had them, so it was a pretty stupid question for someone to ask.  Obviously, after the second set of twins, I expected people to wonder if my pregnancies were natural or due to fertility, and I totally understood their curiosity.  So many people asked that I started to volunteer the information before they asked, just to save time.  I always say "My brother and sister are twins; it runs in my family."  If I don't have Logan and Lindsey with me, I never tell people that I have two sets because it takes five more minutes to get to where I am going.  If I have Logan and Lindsey with me, I always say "They're twins too" so Logan and Lindsey don't feel like yesterday's news.  There was a brief period when Logan got taller than Lindsey and it wasn't obvious that they were twins anymore.  As soon as that happened the questions stopped.....and then I had another set.  By the way, there are women I know, to this day, who refuse to accept that I didn't use fertility.  They will say "I thought you were on fertility" and I get sort of irritated.  I get irritated that I even bothered to explain the entire thing if they were just going to reject the idea of it happening naturally, and I swear that it's a bitch thing sometimes, a jab.  


I think that the heat fried people's brains yesterday.  I walked around with Carson and Dylan (who are blonde, matching in attire, and exactly the same height) and people asked their usual questions,  however, it was very strange because people were patting themselves on the backs for knowing that they were twins.  "Yes, they are twins" I said several times throughout the day and I would get "Oh, I could tell!  I knew it, by the way they were acting together and they seem really close!  I just knew it!"  I wanted to say "Your ability to observe obvious details is outstanding!  You must have memorized the scientific method a while back, because GOLLY you have MASTERED it!"  It was bizarre.  Like, really?  You are giving yourself a trophy for knowing that they are twins?  I think that I am going to have some fun from now on.  When people ask if they are twins I am going to say "No, they aren't related" just to see them squirm.  

One of the reasons that I am so understanding when people ask about the identical/fraternal thing is because I have a brother and sister who are twins.  I understand that not everyone knows that there are two eggs and two sperm when you are talking fraternal, and identical is one fertilized egg that splits within the first seven days of conception.  However, I have never understood when people ask if Logan and Lindsey are identical.  I really want to say "Well, one has a penis and one has a vagina.  What do YOU think?"  But I just answer them nicely and explain the details of what fraternal means, but only if they ask me.  I am never against explaining things.  One girl asked me yesterday if Carson and Dylan were "infernal" and I said "Yes, they are FRATERNAL", but I slipped it in so I wouldn't make her feel dumb.  

The "Infernal" comment made me laugh because it reminded me of when people say "mute" point instead of "moot".  This then reminded me of Joey on Friends saying "moo" point.  Let's end today's post with a clip, shall we?


Great scene:
http://youtu.be/iObtPBh3NXs


Have a great day!





Wednesday, July 18, 2012

Superman vs Batman




I made a statement a couple of nights ago that I now have to take back.  I said that I didn't understand guys and their obsession with Superman.  I also said that I preferred Batman to Superman, but I have made a mistake.  After a discussion with one of my guy friends, who disagreed with me, I have to say that Superman is definitely the better superhero.  

In my opinion, if the two Superheroes were music, Batman would be the Stones and Superman would be the Beatles when they wore black suits and had goody-goody haircuts.  Because you see, Batman is really cool, but Superman is wholesome, generous, squeaky-clean, and classic.



So here are the points of our discussion and why I was wrong to say Batman was better.  Batman will never look the same to me again:

  1. Batman is a womanizer and Superman is probably a virgin and totally in love with only one girl, Lois.  I guess it makes sense that I would've preferred Batman, and so would most girls, because he is the bad boy and probably emotionally unavailable. 
  2. Batman only saves Gotham city, whereas Superman saves the entire world.  Batman only cares about Gotham City because he has businesses there.  He probably doesn't really care much about its citizens.
  3. Batman is a spoiled rich boy who lives on his daddy's money; Superman actually has a job.  (This is the point in the conversation that really made me choose Superman over Batman.  I can't stand spoiled, arrogant rich boys who squander their daddy's money....even if they have a bat mask.)  
  4. Batman depends on technology; Superman really has superpowers because he is an alien.  Who are you going to trust when it gets down to it?  An alien with unfailing flying powers (assuming that there isn't Kryptonite anywhere near) or a man it a bat outfit with a flame retardant car and a wad of bills?  Definitely the alien.  I just had a thought.....you know who might be an awesome superhero?  Inspector Gadget.  I could definitely trust a set of go-go gadget arms.    

And this is why Superman wins.  Plus, guys look really cute when they wear Superman t-shirts.  

Tuesday, July 17, 2012

Holy Family

We all knew that it was going to be 100 degrees yesterday, so I pretty much had one goal.....keep the kids busy, cool, and out of the house.  My mom has a beautiful home, but the house was built in like the 1800's or something, like many houses on the East side, so there are only air conditioning units in the bedrooms.  The last heat wave we had made me stay away from sharp objects because I wanted to kill someone if they even talked to me, so I had a plan this time.  (Ok, I am kidding.  I didn't want to literally kill, but we were metaphorically all at each other's throats.)

The first thing we did was go to the gym.  LA Fitness is in the mall; it's upstairs in an office building.  It's big, but not nearly as large as the one at home.  Anyway, I let Logan go book shopping at Barnes and Noble while I worked out.  When we were finished we went to the food court and the kids played in the play area for a pretty long time.  When they were bored of that we decided to drive around a little.  I showed Logan my old house, my old school, and we played at the park that's across from my old school; I think it's called Lake Bluff or something like that.

Below is a picture of my old school, Holy Family.  I have written about Holy Family before.  Holy Family is where I wore plaid skirts, where I met Katie, and where Sister Mary Francis was principal.  Sister Mary Francis is the reason I was afraid of nuns.  She used to click-clack down the marble hallway and shake her giant key ring....I always felt like she was coming for me.  I remember getting sent to her office (probably for talking and disrupting the class in some way) and as soon as I would open the door, cigarette smoke rolled out of the doorway and into my face.  She sat there in dim light behind her desk and with her raspy voice, she called me in for yet another lecture.  I picture a scary, bony finger, pointing and shaking at me too, but I think that part is just my imagination because it would complete the picture.  I think that if you picture George Burns as the devil, you can accurately see Sister Mary Francis behind her desk.  I was truly scared of her and her orange-grey hair, but it still didn't keep me from talking in class.

Katie and I became friends on a bus; we were going on a field trip.  We were fighting over who liked Bette Midler more and we argued over the spelling of her name.  (Isn't that weird? We were 10 and fighting over who liked Bette Midler more.)  She said you spell her name "Bet" and I said "Bette".  Of course, I ended up the speller and she ended up the business-savvy one.  We also discovered that we both loved American Girl dolls and not only that, but the same American Girl dolls, Molly and Samantha.  I remember going to Madison on a field trip.  My mom got me a throwaway camera and the only pictures that I came home with were of a dead squirrel on the lawn.  I have no idea why Katie and I found this dead squirrel so interesting, but perhaps it's because we were in fourth grade.  These are just a few memories I have of my friendship with Katie.

Here are a couple of pictures of my school.  The second one shows what I called "the cubby".  If you look closely, it's behind the trashcans.  It is a doorway between the school and the church.  This is where I would hide and shiver and chatter my teeth and pray to God for time to go by faster so I could go inside where it was warm.  I used to beg my teachers to let me stay in with them at recess, but they never allowed it.  Katie used to tell me that I would warm up if I ran around, but I never listened.  I just curled into a ball and waited to freeze to death.  I was sure that I would freeze to death, every day.

Holy Family


My safe haven from the wind and snow


Have a great day!


Monday, July 16, 2012

Saturday in the Park

I wrote about Greg's "Turn It Around" movement with sheer joy yesterday, so I didn't mention what I did on Saturday night.  I have to mention it though because it was so nice and the kids absolutely loved it.

This annual event is called Gathering on the Green; it's in Mequon.  Basically, the Milwaukee symphony plays songs from famous movies and you sit on blankets and listen.  They play clips from the movies on a big screen once it's dark outside.  For those of you thinking that it sounds boring and stuffy, there is beer and wine and probably liquor to, so there.  Anyway, occasionally company dancers came out and performed to the music.  Superman and Darth Vader fought on the stage and Carson and Dylan thought that it was real.  They loved it.  Luckily, we had perfectly nice weather.  The kids enjoyed being outside and sitting on a blanket, eating, and running around.  I read my book and enjoyed the music.  

After the orchestra was finished, there were fireworks.  These were the greatest fireworks that I have ever seen.  They were very close to us, which was cool, and they synced them to music.  For example, they synced them to "Footloose" and "I've Had the Time of My Life" from Dirty Dancing.  Dylan loved them, but Carson's little smile was worth the entire night.  The look on his face was one of the cutest things that I have ever seen in my life.  He was saying "Wow" and was so amazed by each firework.  I wish I could get that excited about fireworks, or anything.  Kids are the best.

Yesterday my mom took me shopping for a Coach bag, an early birthday present.  We hung around and I read my book while the kids played outside.  We went to mass at 7:00 and came back and had dinner.  We watched Batman Begins entirely too late and I fell asleep.  

I had a thought while I was watching Christian Bale play Batman last night.  Why are guys obsessed with Superman?  He isn't  that cool, and yet there are like 20 songs that talk about him and kryptonite. Superman wears tights.  Batman's outfit is way cooler.  And really?  No one is going to find out that you are Superman if the only thing hiding your identity is a pair of glasses?  It's so obvious that Clark is the same person.  Now a BAT mask can guard your identity.







Sunday, July 15, 2012

Don't Like It? Turn it Around!

My step-dad, Greg, is one of the coolest and smartest people that I have ever met.  He is literally a genius (although he won't let you in on this little secret), he is hilarious, and he is opinionated without being obnoxious or unlikable.  He is a phlegmatic, so only on occasion does he become angry or irrational.  The bad thing about having a personality like the one he has is that everyone laughs at you when you become angry or irrational.

For example, he cannot put things together without throwing something across the room or shouting a profanity.  I hide my smile and my chuckle to myself and only later do I dare tell him that I was laughing at him.  I really do understand the frustration he feels when putting something together.  Everything is made in China and China makes nothing but crap that either doesn't work from the get-go or falls apart within the first  five minutes of completion.  To make things worse, they OWN the United States.  Nice, right?  Communists who make crap own us.  Wonderful.

Ok, so now that you understand what Greg is like, I can go into my story.  We were all outside this morning enjoying a coffee and a scone with our books when something sparked a conversation.  We started to talk about "All the President's Men" and how I have never read the book nor seen the movie.  I was talking about how much I love the Washington Post and I mentioned that schools don't properly educate kids about the Cold War and Watergate.  In fact, anything that I have learned about Watergate has been on my own.  You learn in school that Nixon was impeached, but you don't really understand why because there's only half a page dedicated to the subject in our history books. Anyway, somehow we started talking about how the journalists who uncovered the Watergate scandal must have felt.  I said that I can imagine the excitement that they felt and that they were probably very fearful having that kind of information in their possession.  This conversation turned into a discussion about scandals today, and eventually it turned into a discussion about crappy books by corrupt politicians and their mistresses.

I have known Greg for a long time, which is why it's amazing that I never knew about one of his habits, or should I say silent protests.  It turns out that any time Greg is in a bookstore and he sees a book by someone he can't stand, he turns the book upside-down and around.   Newt Gingrich?  Gets the flip.  Ann Coulter?  Gets the flip.  Sometimes he flips just the display, but sometimes he flips the entire collection!  I can just see him in the bookstore, grumbling and flipping in silent protest.  Apparently he has always done this!  My mom says that sometimes she sees books flipped in a store and she thinks "Greg was here".

I told him that I was going to write about his little movement and he said "Please do!  I am waiting for it to catch on!"  If we all did it, wouldn't it make some kind of difference?  We could slowly silence the voices of people who shouldn't be writing and getting book deals.  On that note, I have to go now.  I am headed to Barnes and Noble to attack Snooki's bestseller.






Saturday, July 14, 2012

How Disney Princesses Sold Out



My family and I were watching "The Little Mermaid" with the kids about a week ago.  My sister saw the movie with my mom when she was a little girl and during the final scene of the movie, when they are sailing off into happily ever after, she screamed out "Yeah right".  We were all laughing because a little kid said it, but we were also laughing because let's face it.....fairy tales are totally ridiculous.  Just as Jerry Maguire saying "You complete me" is a total crock, so are most fairy tales.

What I have learned over the years (because I was so unlike my sister; I was a dreamer) is that love is not completely forgoing yourself in order to make a happy ending.  Love is not giving more than the other person is willing to give.  It's a partnership.  Love is respect.  You can't respect a doormat just like you can't respect someone who doesn't care about who you are as a person. If you give up who you are, then who are they supposed to love?  If you change for someone, can you even tell them who they are supposed to love?  No, because you don't know who you are anymore.

Let's take a look at the Disney princesses and how they completely compromised who they were for a man......

Ariel (The Little Mermaid): Sold her soul and most beautiful feature (her voice) to a sea witch in exchange for legs.  Why?  For a man.  So here's the deal.  Ariel lives in the ocean and this dude lives on land.  She leaves her entire identity, her immortality, and her whole family to live with a man who she barely knows, FOREVER.  What if he ends up a bastard?  She now has legs and a set of lungs that can't withstand water; she has also lost her ability to speak and sing.  And who says she wasn't completely happy with her fin?  Maybe her fin glistened and now her legs have cellulite.  So now she is a mute with cellulite, she can't see her family anymore and all she has is a bastard prince to take care of.  Thank goodness she won't live forever.  What did the guy have to give to Ariel that he couldn't get back?  Nothing, of course.

Lesson: Give everything to a guy and it will work out.

Jasmine (Aladdin): Aladdin was a sociopath and lied about his identity.  She forgave the bastard liar, married him and let him live in her palace.

Lesson: Forgive for love, even if the guy is a chainsaw murderer.

Cinderella: Instead of telling her sisters and evil step-mother to go to hell, she waits for her fairy godmother to bail her out, so a guy can then bail her out for good.

Lesson: You can't do it alone, so wait for a man and he will rescue you.  I wonder how many strippers saw this movie.  "I will use my body to bail me out, and then hopefully while I am naked, I will find a guy to bail me out forever. "

Belle (Beauty and the Beast): She has Stockholm Syndrome.

Lesson: First of all, kidnappers are nice. Secondly, even if someone is ugly, you can still be attracted to them.   (Yeah right.)  Your sex life will be great, even if there isn't attraction.  (Yeah right.)  Also, ugly guys turn into princes after you prove your love for them.....um, not going to happen.  Anyone aging knows that.

Snow White: Trust everyone.

Lesson:  Trust strangers giving you poison.  Ok, in real life, you are dead.  Even Channing Tatum can't wake you from death.  Make better decisions, Snow White.


Aurora (Sleeping Beauty):  Sleep your life away until your prince comes along.


Lesson: Be completely inactive and let all decisions you make be in vain until your real life begins.  Begins, meaning when you are saved by your prince.  You might as well be a lump until a man comes along because of course,  that's the only reason for living.

Pocahontas: This one is just completely historically inaccurate.  I mean, could they have made her boobs any bigger?  And John Smith was a racist a-hole in real life.  Enough said.


The only Disney princesses that I really have any respect for are Tiana (Princess and the Frog) and Rapunzel  (Tangled).  These movies depict a strong female and more of a cooperative relationship.  Tiana and the lazy, spoiled prince hop around together trying to figure out how to become human again.  Actually, Tiana is a lot smarter and more resourceful than the prince.  In Tangled, Rapunzel uses a thief to lead her to the lights.....at least she is a good negotiator.  She is a princess and saves HIM in the end.  How's that for a role reversal?  I can't remember Mulan, but I am pretty sure that she is tough and surrounds herself with good friends.

I hope that at least one person can appreciate my warped sense of humor and cynicism.  Have a great Saturday!  






Friday, July 13, 2012

Flashback Friday-Slackin' but Dancin'

Ok, so I am really slacking on the writing, but I am having so much fun and living my life!  Plus, you need something to write about, right?

Yesterday morning the boys and I went to Zumba.  We chilled all day and then around 6:30 we went to Ash and Matt's.  Matt watched the boys and Amelie last night so Ashli and I could go Salsa dancing.  O.M.G., I could easily become a Salsa Club Rat.  I had so much fun, it's ridiculous.  First of all, I love to dance.  Secondly, I like that you have to be asked to dance, like a lady.  Thirdly, it's actual DANCING and not grinding with strangers.....that's so gross.  I have never been well-liked at clubs because I am a beotch to guys who want to dance.  I would rather dance alone, thank you.  I don't know you, so back it up.....unless it's actual partner dancing.

It is true that a good partner makes all the difference.  There were some dances where I was pretty much hating life and getting stepped on, but then with a good partner I was getting twirled, dipped, and put into the air!  It was so much fun.  I felt like Baby.  No one puts Baby in a corner.  HAHA!

I could dance like 23 hours a day.  I never seem to get enough.  My sister was so ready to go at 3 AM and I was still spinning and smiling.  We didn't go to sleep until 6 AM and I woke up at 8:30.  I feel great.  I took the kids to breakfast and we are chilling and watching some turtle movie on Netflix right now.  My mom says that I am a mutant like she is (she can get by on a couple hours of sleep), but I think it's called ADHD....too much energy sometimes.  Below are a couple of pictures:



Outside of Excalibur
I forgot to mention that we were dancing in heels and my foot started
to lock up.  We went to Walgreens to find flip-flops.  I was in such heaven
not to be wearing heels, I walked to the cashier with the string still attached.  I was
laughing so hard that I was crying.  My sister said "Don't move another inch!  I am taking a picture
of how retarded you look!"  Anyway, that's what this picture is.

Since it's Flashback Friday and I talked about something from yesterday, here's a flashback that is relevant.  Remember this song?  This is a funny little montage from a really stupid movie.  Dance Off's are the funniest ever....

http://youtu.be/efBdvYr-drw


Have a great day!


Wednesday, July 11, 2012

Milwaukee Zoo

Katie, Ash and I took our kids to the zoo today.  Their zoo is way better than our zoo.  A while back I wrote about how it sucks that you can't see the animals anymore because the animal rights activists made us get rid of the cages and small rooms.  I am happy that the animals have room to roam at our zoo, but it makes seeing the animals difficult.  Apparently, if you were an animal it would be like hitting the lottery to end up at Zoo Atlanta because it's like Jurassic Park! In Milwaukee, however, they have the monkeys and gorillas in cages and rooms!  You can see everything very so well!  It's awesome!  The tigers are locked in a room in Milwaukee...ours are free to roam in what looks like the jungle!  I don't even think that Carson and Dylan understood how big and scary tigers are until today.  They loved it.  One of the tigers looked really angry at a kid who was clearly taunting him.  I kinda wanted to pull the Harry Potter trick and remove the glass for a second so the bratty kid could be eaten.  Oh, crap.  Did I say that out loud?  His dad wasn't any better.  He was like a third grader; he was banging on the glass and making faces at the tiger.  What a nerd.  

Ok, so the best part about the zoo is that they have the animals that we don't have.  We may have pandas, but they have polar bears, penguins, alligators, sharks, giant sea turtles, and seals.  We have none of those.  Carson and Dylan were so excited.  Personally, I was very excited to see the polar bear.  He looked very hot though and I felt sort of sorry for him.  He had a pool, but he just rested in the sun.  He must not be very smart.  He must just be thankful that he isn't clinging to an ice-cube in the middle of the Atlantic.   

I thought that some of the people that were roaming around the zoo belonged in cages as well.  MAN, there were some freaks at the Milwaukee Zoo today!  To quote Katie, "The people-watching today was top-notch!"  Many times throughout the day I cocked my head and said "Really?????  You just said that?"  People were such rude little bastards today!  

Hope you are having a fantastic day!  To all of my readers at home, I heard it got down to 72 degrees last night!  Awesome!  I hope you are staying cool.  Miss you all! 


By the way, I went to yoga this morning and the instructor didn't shave her armpits.....like, it's been probably five years.  Any reason for this that I am aware of?  What is the purpose of this hairiness?  It takes two seconds.  I just don't get it.  The mysteries of the world......


I am going to Zumba tomorrow with Katie and then we are doing a 5K at Bastille Days tomorrow night.  Yay!  If you want to know what Bastille Days is, here is a link....


http://www.easttown.com/events/bastille-days/storm-the-bastille



Oh, and I am aware of how mean I was today.  Just one of those days!  





Tuesday, July 10, 2012

N.W.A. Said It Best

I got a parking ticket last night for parking in FRONT OF MY MOM'S house!  Apparently, my brother has been calling my car in at night (thank you, Tyson).  You have to call a number to say that your car will be there all night, otherwise you get a ticket.  They "chalk your tires" to see if you have been there longer than a certain amount of time.  WHAT the HELL is that?  I have to pay the state of Wisconsin $33 for parking on a residential street in front of a house that is owned by my mother???  My question is this: WHERE AM I TO PARK MY CAR???  On the damn roof?  On the stinking grass????  There are no driveways, and there is only one spot in the garage for my mom.  How about this, Wisconsin.....kiss my butt because there is no way I am paying you!  There is no sign with any number telling you the rules, so basically you are trying to screw the out-of-towners!  BITE ME!  Now I remember that this used to happen to me all winter in front of my apartment building in OUR parking lot where I PAID RENT!  When the Wisconsin Police or Traffic  Violation Loser Department (I'm talking to you, policemen on bicycles) decide to fly me into Wisconsin for my day in court, THAT'S when I will pay the ticket!  So basically, it will be a cold day in HELL when you see my $33!

I am so pissed right now because I will probably have to pay the damn thing because I always follow the damn rules!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  Every week that you don't pay it, it goes up!  By September, I will owe $63!  UGHHHHH!   Where's that N.W.A. song when I need it?


Nora Ephron

I haven't been writing because I have been busy and out of my element.  There are things that I have wanted to write about and haven't and it's really starting to irritate me.  For example, I haven't had a chance to say how extremely upset I am that Nora Ephron has passed away.  She was no doubt, my favorite screenplay writer.  For those of you with MALE PARTS, she wrote When Harry Met Sally, Sleepless in Seattle, You've Got Mail.....to name a few.  They are tolerable romantic comedies for men and absolute favorites for women.  What was so awesome about her is that she had an ability to notice the differences between men and women and laugh about them.  (The argument about whether men and women can be friends, for example, is hilarious and something that we still ask.)  Her dialogue was priceless and her sense of humor was witty and unforgettable.  Her movies also give you hope that there are happy endings in real life, probably because she writes things as they are in reality. She writes about the cynics, the stupid, the arrogant, the broken-hearted......all people that we have to deal with daily, and yet among the chaos that exists with these people and throughout our lives, she tells us that there is still something to laugh about.  I love that she paid attention to the small things in life too.  There are things that everyone notices but never mentions and she did....this makes for a great movie.

My mom, my sister and I are watching a Nora Ephron movie every night this week (when we are not out and about).  I suggest that you do the same if you haven't seen her movies.  Yes, even you, men.  You would understand us a lot more if you watched movies written by Nora Ephron and Nancy Meyers.  (Nancy Meyers wrote What Women Want, It's Complicated, The Holiday, and Something's Gotta Give.)

We will miss you, Nora Ephron!


"So you're saying that a man CAN be friends with a woman he
finds UNATTRACTIVE?" Nope. You pretty much wanna nail them too.  

"Didn't you see Fatal Attraction?"
"The Godfather is the answer to any question.  What should I pack for my
summer vacation?  Leave the gun, take the cannoli.  What day of the
week is it?  Maunnday, Tuesday, Thursday, Wednesday." 

Monday, July 9, 2012

Counting Crows Concert

Greg, Ash, Tyson, Torie and I went to Chicago on Saturday.  My mom kept all of the precious children.  We had so much fun!  First we got coffee together and then walked to the hotel to check Tyson and Torie in.  They had a little “babymoon” together at Swissotel. Greg, Ash and I went to see Counting Crows at Navy Pier. 

First of all, there were only supposed to be like 2000 people at this concert and I am not even sure there were that many.  It was in the ballroom at the end of the pier.  It was open bar, catered, and because Greg works for Groupon, we were VIP…..that was cool, even though I didn’t really use any of the perks because I wasn’t sure what they were.  We were so close to the stage; I couldn’t believe it and my sister (Mega Crows Fan) was jumping up and down and flipping out.  Grace Potter and the Nocturnals opened for them; she was really good!  I had heard of them but never listened to them; I will now. 

Everyone started to take their places near the stage and it seemed that a lot of us short girls were standing in a group.  A 6’3 a-hole with butterfly stitches and bruises all over his face squeezed his way through the crowd and parked his sorry ass right in front of us.  He was directly in front of a girl next to me; she was very irritated. I admit that I had a drink I my hand, but I know that the liquor is not the reason I said something to this rude bastard.  I always assume that if someone’s car is beat up, they suck at driving.  It’s the same thing with faces—if your face is beat up, you are more than likely a major butthead—the guy deserved us saying something because he is probably rude most of the time.  I tapped him and said “Excuse me, but she can’t see now.”  I pointed to the short girl.  He shrugged his shoulders.  I said “Aren’t you going to move?  We have been standing here for a long time trying to get a good spot and you shoved your way in front of her.”  He looked at me like he didn’t care.  I asked the girl next to me how tall she was.  I said “She is 5’1.  Aren’t you going to move?”  He said no.  I said “It looks like you run your mouth a lot.  Guess what!  So do I!  Move your ass!”  He rolled his eyes.  Then a couple of guys next to us got upset because he blew us off.  They said “You’re going to stand in front of a bunch of small girls and not move?”  I couldn’t hear anything else that they said, but there was some shoving and that was it.  We shut our mouths because we didn’t want a brawl.  The girls and I squeezed in front of the a-hole and called him names and made fun of his stitches, loud enough so that he could hear us.  (Very mature, I know.)  The rest of the concert was awesome, even though the jerk was sort of stepping on our feet and singing the whole time. 

Counting Crows are really great live and Adam Duritz seems so sweet and cool.  He almost seemed shy on stage…..so cute, considering he could be a major jerk after 20 years of fame.  They were really good AND they played “Colorblind”, which is my absolute favorite.  I taught myself this song on the piano and it’s my favorite thing to play; easy as well. 

Here are a couple of links and then below are pictures.

Grace Potter:

http://youtu.be/MA_ode55DFA


Colorblind:

http://youtu.be/164jS1qnCU0


Here are some pictures:

On the way to Chicago!

In the hotel room before we left for the concert
Date with the Daughters
Me and my brudder.....I love him.  We are outside of the hotel
View from the hotel room 
The River
From another window







Friday, July 6, 2012

Flashback Friday-Unexplained Hiatus and an Old Picture

Well, I took a little break from my blog.  Long story short, I had a great time with my family.....such a great time that I decided to come back.  I flew into Atlanta last Saturday (got home at midnight) and started the drive back to Milwaukee with the kids the next day.  The drive takes two days for me because I stop in Indiana, so I got here around noon on Monday.  I only have the boys because Lindsey had too much going on; she stayed with her daddy.  She is going to the beach with her best friend this next week and then she has cheerleading camp the following week. 

I have a million pictures to post and tons of stories to write about, but very little time because I am busy trying to enjoy my life and my family.  The best part about my trip is that my brother, Tyson, and his wife and baby are here....this means that Ash, Ty and I are all together.  This rarely happens and it is so much fun.  We are very goofy together and we tend to act like we are 10 years old.  (Even sober.) 

I am going to Chicago tomorrow with my sister and step-dad.  We are seeing the Counting Crows and staying for the night.  More tomorrow.....

Oh, and no Word of the Day.  Too hot to learn.  On that note, have you noticed how cranky people are in the heat?  I am sure that Hell a fantastic place to be....Hitler and Stalin suffering from heat stroke?  Yikes! 


Ashli, Brittany, and Tyson....October, 1982 (I think)