The Ugly Truths Every Woman Needs to Accept About Men

1. Men are visual. You have to take care of yourself. Sorry.  I have always pissed people off by saying this, but it's simply true.  You can go on and on and say "He should love me no matter what I look like!"  Fine.  He loves you, but don't shave or shower...completely let yourself go and see how that works for you.  Men have standards too. Smelly sex is not better than no sex. On the other hand, remember that we are our worst critics.  He isn't expecting Heidi Klum; we are. He's happy to get laid, so go for it.
2. Don't Be Too Bossy in the Bedroom. Being vocal about what you want is one thing, but if you're a nag or make him feel like a total failure during sex....good luck ever fixing that one. You know how we remember everything that has ever happened in our relationship?  That's the one he remembers.
3. Men need sex. Girls, it's just true.  Work through your issues, but they have to have it.  They just do.  It isn't just a physical thing; it's how they show you they love you.  And have you ever met anyone who said "I wish I wouldn't have had that orgasm?"  Or "Man, that orgasm really messed up my day."  You need that closeness in your relationship and you need to be aware of how long you go without it. He is.
4. They want a lady in the street and a freak in the sheets.  A monogamous slut is what I like to say.  Be their girl, but be open and adventurous....with him.
5. Men want the mother, the sister, the nun and the whore.  You have to nurture your man like a mother, play with him like a sister, guide him down the right path, and put out and be fun sexually. That old expression "F*** him, Feed him and shut the hell up" may be rude, but there's truth to it.  You wanna see a happy man?  Sleep with him, make him a sandwich and be concise with your feelings and stories. 
6. They aren't talkers like we are. We have better communication skills.  I have girlfriends who complain about their men because they're basically expecting them to behave like a woman and I think "Why aren't you a lesbian?" Because honestly, I don't get it. Girl bonding time does serve a purpose. Don't be with a man and expect the same results that you get from your girlfriends. 
7. They have a shelf life as far as listening goes. When I say be concise, be concise.  Even the most open and emotionally present man is at the end of the day, still a man.  If you see his eyes glazing over, you have gone too far. The timer has gone off.  You may as well turn around and talk to the dog. 
8. To answer your question, no, men don't get it. A lot of times, no, they don't understand our passive-aggressive "Nothings" and "Fines".  Speak up and say exactly what you think and feel, in a measured and logical manner. They are socially retarded when it comes to female companionship past a certain threshold. They don't read you like your girlfriends do and that's ok!
9. They don't like the drama. Calm down.  He hates how you're acting right now.
10. If you have a man that helps, don't critique. DO NOT COACH HIM!  If you have a guy who picks up, does laundry, cleans, takes care of the kids, let him do it the way he does it.  Coach him one time and he won't do it again.  You can't control everything, so back up, or do it yourself. 
11. Don't Nag Him. He will resent you, hate you, cut you off...When I say he wants you to be his mother, I didn't mean by becoming a nag.  Nurture, don't nag.  If he really isn't listening, I guess he'll get it once you leave his ass. 
12. Be supportive of his hobbies.  He didn't really want to take you to the ballet, nor did he feel like watching The Notebook.  He deserves to hunt and fish. 
13. Allow him to hang out with his friends. Do you really want to hang out with him all the time?  Do you want him to come to every baby shower and girl bonding event with you?  Plus, they aren't doing anything interesting. We're the ones blabbing about our sex lives.
14. Don't blab about your sex life. Guys really don't like this and I am not sure where they got a worse rep for talking about their sexual experiences.  We are way worse.
15. Don't bring your family into your marriage. Let your issues be your issues, unless you are in danger or something.  You want to see a guy clam up, spill your marital problems and make your mother give him the "I know all about you" eye. 

By the way, I wrote this and then had it approved by a man.  He told me I nailed it.

Tomorrow: The Ugly Truths Every Man Needs to Accept About Women.