Now THAT'S a Crazy Lady

If you are a guy, you are lucky.

I know that this is very personal, but at the same time, it isn't because we are all adults and I think it is important to learn to laugh things off.  If you are a girl, you already know.  If you are a guy, be glad you aren't and listen to what I am saying.

I have not been on birth control pills for years because they give me migraines and make me snippy and emotional.  However, I recently decided to try the pill again.  Bad idea.  When I say bad idea, I mean that it was one of the worst ideas ever.  I am very in tune with my body and I know when something feels off.  I knew within the first couple of days that I felt different and that I didn't like it, but I thought I was just getting used to them.  YEAH, getting used to being a bitch!  Let me skip to the end and tell you that I didn't even finish two whole weeks of pills.  I quit taking them last Friday. In the last couple of weeks, I have gotten three or four migraines, I have cried uncontrollably, I have snapped at people for absolutely no reason, and I have wanted to choke someone out in Zumba for stepping on my foot.  I was at McDonald's ordering a Happy Meal for Carson and I was irritated that I had to tell her he wanted milk twice.  Can you imagine the nerve of someone asking you a simple question more than once?  HOW DARE THEY?  Ugh.  Thankfully I didn't say anything horrendous to her, but just feeling irritated about something like that was not cool and that was pretty much it for me and the pill.  It is not like me to feel irritated to that level....at all. 

A lot of girls feels irritated to some degree, naturally, even if she isn't on birth control, but I really don't experience that very often.  Luckily.  The only thing that happens to me when I am not on the pill is that I cry on one day each month and I never know why.  I always remember sometime in the afternoon, and I move on and ignore what it was I was crying about because it was just hormones, it wasn't real.  I never feel like screaming at someone because they asked me how many ketchup packets I want, when I already told them.

Hormones are powerful.  Let's put it this way......I have a friend who is always logical, always kind of "the man" in most situations.  If I am being illogical, she snaps me into reality with her practicality.  She is very logical most of the time.  But I still get calls from her that are pretty much just hormonal rages and rants.  She too is capable of hating her husband's face and wants to cry while eating chocolate and watching "Father of the Bride".

Hormones.  They're evil, I tell you!

What are hormones?

Noun A regulatory substance produced in an organism and transported in tissue fluids such as blood or sap to stimulate specific cells or... A synthetic substance with a similar effect. Yeah.  Whatever that means.  Here is my definition: Noun A natural disaster within a female's body.  On the inside, one feels out of control.  These inside occurrences show up on the outside through the "need" to eat chocolate, by calling herself fat, crying about things anything, and snapping at those who love her.  Secretly, one can feel a hormonal imbalance and knows she is wrong while she is crying and screaming, but it doesn't change the fact that she hates your face momentarily. Hormones can make the sweetest voice aggravating, and any words that come out of any mouth indeed "stupid".

My daughter is 11 and she has hormones rushing through her body right now.  She's been driving me nuts for the last year or so.  She's been very difficult and I keep explaining that hormones are no excuse to misbehave.  I will say this....Poor thing.  I am kind of happy that I experienced this for a couple of weeks because I had forgotten how it feels.  It's horrible.  It is as if an alien has taken over your body.  Maybe that's also what happened to Britney Spears......

No more pills for me.  And if I have snapped at you lately, I am truly sorry.  And this is where I casually insert this picture.....

The best apology ever