Top 10-Ways To Annoy Me

1.) Ask me the same question over and over after I've already given you an answer.  Unless I say "I don't know," I meant it the first time. I will hate you and I will want to crawl out of my skin. You're either getting a stare down for hours or some scary kind of scream resulting in me running around as if I have a spider down my pants. I equally hate when someone forces me to talk to them after I say I don't want to talk about something. I want to run away. What's even worse is that I hate when I want to talk about something to someone like me and they run away. That's so annoying, which means I annoy myself. I know how people like me feel, so I should never make someone talk. But who isn't like that? If you don't want to talk, who likes being badgered? Yeah, it's just annoying. 

2.) Tap me over and over. Yes I'm ignoring you, until I scream "whatttttt!" (usually only children do this. It's a sure way to get smacked.)

3.) Leave me voicemails that contain monologues. Wait. Am I supposed to call you back still? You already told me your entire life's story. Or I assume you did...I didn't listen, I deleted it as soon as you started telling the story. 

4.) Be a Grapefruit. I really despise cutting grapefruit, but I  love to eat them. It takes forever. 

5.) Have  no concept of personal space. Please move. I don't want to be touched or fondled....by you. 

6.) Talk to me when I'm on the phone; ok so my kids are really the only ones guilty of this.

7.) Say things like supposeably, or mute point. Rrrrrr.

8.) Complain about your friends on Facebook to your friends on Facebook. Can we say passive aggressive? 

9) Make fun of the food I'm eating. Sorry I don't want to eat squashed pig intestines mashed up with chemicals and lined with strange skin, conveniently called a "hot dog". 

10.)  Brush your teeth in front of me and then dribble the toothpaste all over your chin until you look like you have rabies. Yughhhhhhhh!!!! I try to rationalize that toothpaste is clean, but it doesn't work. I hate watching people brush their teeth.