The Transformed Eye, By Brittany Chenault

I look up to the Heavens.
What have I become?
Heart so shattered, mind so cloudy,
This day I have succumb.
Is it too late? Have I been locked out? 
I whisper one final prayer.
No, he says.  So, come with me.
Your sins I did help bear.
Like glass, your heart is glued together,
the pieces I will replace,
You will become anew and like an angel,
Love filling up the space.
All alone and in the dark,
I did not leave you be.
You wandered out, alone and fragile,
So black, you could not see.
He grabbed my hand and softly pulled,
I follow without hesitation,
The stars came out and filled my eyes,
He never had forsaken.
Why didn't I realize, Why didn't I look,
He was there within my sight,
The world, in all its distracting ways,
Drowned out all the light.
You were there among the valleys,
the hills, the waves, the breeze,
You stood there always arms stretched out,
Only a fool flutters and flees.
How could I be so blind, I say.
For always you were there.
I laugh one time at all my foolishness,
Then I feel my spirit tear.
I feel the hurt, the pain, the suffering.
I remember the tears, the ways of the earth.
And now I feel as God has felt,
Since sin had seen its birth.
My chest it pains as I see my mistakes,
I cry when I see my sin.
I cannot bear to see myself longer,
I'm worthy to be let in.
Hush, small girl. And I felt the wind.
He pulled me toward the sky,
Serenity takes my hand,
And I begin to fly.
The earth beneath me, I wave goodbye,
I feel love and see my spirit.
For I am leaving and have been forgiven,
I hope you can all hear it. 
I see my body, just a shell it was,
no longer full of life.
I do not need it anymore,
No more I'll feel the strife.
For on my face is a transformed eye,
Beautiful and true,
I've seen what you'll see one day soon,
You too will be anew.

Flashback Friday-Pink Floyd, Learning to Fly

"Learning To Fly"

Into the distance, a ribbon of black
Stretched to the point of no turning back
A flight of fancy on a windswept field
Standing alone my senses reeled
A fatal attraction is holding me fast,
How can I escape this irresistible grasp?

Can't keep my eyes from the circling skies
Tongue-tied and twisted, just an earth-bound misfit, I

Ice is forming on the tips of my wings
Unheeded warnings, I thought, I thought of everything
No navigator to find my way home
Unladened, empty and turned to stone
A soul in tension -- that's learning to fly
Condition grounded but determined to try

Can't keep my eyes from the circling skies
Tongue-tied and twisted just an earth-bound misfit, I

Above the planet on a wing and a prayer,
My grubby halo, a vapour trail in the empty air,
Across the clouds I see my shadow fly
Out of the corner of my watering eye
A dream unthreatened by the morning light
Could blow this soul right through the roof of the night

There's no sensation to compare with this
Suspended animation, a state of bliss

Can't keep my mind from the circling skies
Tongue-tied and twisted just an earth-bound misfit, I

 

 

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2NPk5zuMdyw

Symbiosis

Symbiosis means "together" and "living" in Latin.  It is a close relationship between living things; a cooperative relationship.  Quid pro quo kinda deal.  Sometimes these relationships are convenient, and sometimes these relationships are necessary for the parties to function and stay alive. 

When I hear "symbiotic", I tend to think of sea creatures like clown fish and anemones, or bacteria and our bodies (eww), or bees and flowers.  However, I realized last night (won't tell you why), that I think everyone's goal should be to be in a symbiotic relationship, and maybe it is, but we just don't think about it scientifically because we're too busy being complicated. 

I think the concept for a romantic relationship should be this easy:

"Hello, I am Brittany and I would like to be in a symbiotic relationship.  Oh.  Well you're a pain in the ass.  Never mind!  Not with you!" And move on just like a fish, right?  I mean, because if you aren't going to cooperate in a relationship, what the hell is the point of being in one? You may as well do everything you want, happily alone, versus failing miserably with someone else, right? 

Too many times, this is what happens to people:

"Hello, I am Brittany and I am in an unsymbiotic relationship.  I guess I will just whine and bitch about how he drinks too much beer and always watches golf while he pretends to listen to me."  Why do we say that we're smarter than fish and bees?  Clearly, they are smarter.  They work together, mate, and shut the hell up.  We have to be complicated.

You know, maybe that's the problem....two humans together.  Maybe a human and an animal would work.  Take King Kong.  He's in love with a beautiful little blonde who keeps him company,  entertains him and makes him smile.  The beautiful little blonde loves him because he offers her protection when she has never had any.  Beautiful.  And so there ya have it.  What I need is a giant gorilla who lets me talk, flip around and do tricks, and protects me from predators.  So easy.

Top 10-Ways to Block Out Chaos

I have four kids.  I have a lot on my mind.  I always have a lot on my plate.  People often ask me what I do to handle everything.  Here are a few ways I keep my sanity.  P.S.  This sometimes takes discipline......

1. God. I pray and read my Bible most mornings and I pray during yoga.  I pray for the people I love as much as I can, and although I sometimes ask God to fix some things for me and my kids, I mainly pray to learn to accept and submit to whatever God wants for me.  I pray to let go of things.  I hold on really hard, and it's very difficult for me to submit. 
2. Exercise/Diet: Yoga, cardio, weights, stretching.....any body movement helps me.  I calm both my body and my mind.  As far as food goes, you are what you eat.  Eat well, you'll feel well, and you'll deal with the mess of life much better than if you eat crap.
3. Headphones and Music: This is really my most desperate attempt at calming down when I am stressed.  If my children see me walking around with headphones and shaking my head up and down and using hand gestures, they know that at any moment, I may actually go crazy.
4.  Reading: The quickest way to forget what you were thinking about is by reading another's thoughts.
5. Writing: For me, I must write.  It's a need. If a feeling doesn't come out on paper, it's there, boiling beneath me, screaming at me.
6. "Lose" Your Phone and stay off Facebook: The last couple of weeks, I have really been cutting things and people out.  My mind is just too busy.  I can't keep up with everything and focus on what I need to.  How can you think about yourself when you're always answering everyone's calls and texts?  And Facebook is just, ehhhh.  It's the devil sometimes.
7. Go Outside: I love doing this.  Sit outside, or climb a mountain.  Whatever you do, make it intentional.  Pay attention to your surroundings and try to take the quiet in, even if there's white noise.
8. Walk Away from Trouble Brewing: Sometimes you just need a freaking moment to think before you speak.  Take that moment; you have every right and the person will appreciate you not screaming in their face. 
9. Get Organized: This is obvious, but organize your life.  Whether it's your clothes or your love life, get it organized.  Have a purpose and know where everything is.  (Even where your relationships with others are.)
10. Control Your Thoughts: You know, some might think I am on the verge of some kind of break down, and I will be honest....I am, but not the nervous, crazy kind.  I am "detoxing" both mentally and emotionally.  Actually, even physically.  I am just really sick of caring about certain things and people who don't really care about me.  Why should I worry and put all of my energy into things that shouldn't matter in my life or my kids' lives?  If I feel or think something upsetting lately, I try to shrug my shoulders and think "God loves you, Britt.  So do your kids and a lot of people.  Move on". This is all on me, the fact that I let this happen to me.  You have control of your own mind, and while it's nearly impossible to choose who and what you care about, you do have the power to redirect and make choices.

Top 10-Black & White

“When you photograph people in color, you photograph their clothes. But when you photograph people in Black and white, you photograph their souls!” -Ted Grant

"Golden Slumbers fill your eyes.  Smiles await you when you rise."

"If you got worries, then you're like me, don't worry now." 

"I'd hate to look into those eyes and see an ounce of pain."

"Sweet disposition, never too soon."



"May the good Lord be with you
Down every road you roam
And may sunshine and happiness
surround you when you're far from home."



 "Rest your head close to my heart,
never to part, baby of mine."



"What a wonderful world"

"If you want, then start to laugh.  If you must, then start to cry. 
Be yourself, don't hide.  Just believe in destiny."

Bands a Make Her Dance.

 

 

"When you're tired of racing and you found you never left the start, come on
baby, don't let it break your heart"

Flashback Friday-Patience

I'm not saying that this is my favorite Guns N' Roses song, but it's one of them.  And you should hear me sing Axl.  You'll want to jump out of a moving car.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ErvgV4P6Fzc


Shed a tear 'cause I'm missin' you
I'm still alright to smile
Girl, I think about you every day now
Was a time when I wasn't sure
But you set my mind at ease
There is no doubt
You're in my heart now

Said, woman, take it slow
It'll work itself out fine
All we need is just a little patience
Said, sugar, make it slow
And we come together fine
All we need is just a little patience

 I sit here on the stairs
'Cause I'd rather be alone
If I can't have you right now
I'll wait, dear
Sometimes I get so tense
But I can't speed up the time
But you know, love
There's one more thing to consider

Said, woman, take it slow
And things will be just fine
You and I'll just use a little patience
Said, sugar, take the time
'Cause the lights are shining bright
You and I've got what it takes
To make it, We won't fake it,
I'll never break it
'cause I can't take it

I've been walkin' the streets at night
Just tryin' to get it right
Hard to see with so many around
You know I don't like being stuck in the crowd
And the streets don't change
But baby the name
I ain't got time for the game
'Cause I need you
Yeah, yeah, but I need you
Oooh I need you
Whoa I need you
Oooh this time

Ashton Kutcher....in a hat

I have always loved Ashton Kutcher, but after his little speech right here, I want to hunt him down and make him love me.  He's the cutest thing.  Ever.  Is he with Demi anymore?  I don't even know.  I am going to Google it.  Like it matters....

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zuBSRC1zpHw

The idea that he's giving these young kids solid advice about life is pretty hot, but he is also wearing a hat.  The guy is 35 years old and adorable in a baseball cap.  I don't know what it is about guys in hats, but I certainly have always had a fetish.  (Other than those stupid beer funneling hats and cowboy hats, I am totally seduced my a hat.)  If a guy has a pair of converse on AND a hat, well, just, I will stop talking now....

Ashton Kutcher is a terrible illustration of my hat fetish, because he's adorable anyway.  But trust me.  Every guy, to me, looks even better with a hat on his head.

Do you have to do that, Ashton?  Really?

Top 10-Things You May Not Know About Being a Girl....and how they suck.

1.  Our hair gets stuck in our lip gloss when the wind blows.  This is beyond irritating. Lip gloss is pretty, but this is annoying. 
2.  Leg Hair.  A smooth leg is something we even enjoy.  Prickly legs are disgusting.  But did you know that when we get cold, we get Goosebumps, and then we have to shave again?  The worst is when you get out of the shower and freeze your ass off after you JUST shaved.  FAIL.
3.  Headband Headaches.  Headbands are much like a hat is for a guy; it's sort of a commitment.  Once you wear a hat, you will have hat hair if you take it off, right?  It's the same thing for girls with headbands, except that they give us migraines on top of bad hair, so it's worse.  Also, you can't wear sunglasses if you commit to a headband because they literally won't both go on at the same time.  So if you wear a headband, your choice is this: You have committed to an entire day of squinting, and you will get a headache that if you try to relieve, will result in the funkiest hair ever.  Good thing I have one on....oweeeee.
4.  Pantylines.  You know, it's not that big of a deal when you're my age; I know how to handle this.  I'm a big girl.  Thongs really are the best solution.  In fact, I wish I had invented the thong. However, at one point in our lives, we had to make a choice to get used to a permanent wedgie. You guys just don't know the little things that we decide to do, in order to be pretty for you.  Ok, and for other girls, and yes, for ourselves.  We have to make a million decisions in the morning, just to get dressed.  I hope you appreciate it.                                                                       
5.  Five lbs of Water Weight.  One week out of every month, we get to feel fat no matter what we do.  The crappiest part about this is that when this wonderful thing called our period goes away, we're old, and we really will be fat.  Good thing we're bitches this entire week.  You guys deserve it for getting out of this one. 
6.  If we act like men, we're bitches. Now I want to use Hillary Clinton as an example of this because I am trying to paint a picture.  Bear with me.  I know she really does seem like a bitch, but here's the thing.....Imagine this little girl, Hillary.  Hillary is swinging on a tire swing, gazing up at the branches and thinking about who she's going to become one day.  She has big dreams; she wants to be powerful and she wants to make a difference in the world.  Then little Hillary grows up and finds out that if she accomplishes what she wants to, people will call her a "bitch".  OR, she can be nice, she could be a whore, and sleep her way to the top. So she marries Bill, becomes First Lady, and then Monica Lewinski proves her theory to be right.  We call Little Hillary a bitch, but meanwhile, Monica gave a blow job and got her own line of handbags.  I mean, are you seeing this clearly, at least in this moment?  I'd be pissed off if I were Hillary, not because my husband cheated on me, but because I was the "bitch" who forgave him.  When she forgave him, she proved to be just a girl, one who is just as sentimental as the rest of us girls.  And her theory about sleeping to the top? It was TRUE!  Monica, you SUCK!  Still!  Like 15 years later and I still think you suck.  Hillary, bitch on.  At least you aren't a tramp.
7.  Dressing Rooms Make Us Sick.  It doesn't matter how good you look or how tiny you are, every girl usually despises a dressing room, unless it's Hollister because it's dark.  (Which doesn't make any sense, by the way, because the clothes at Hollister are tiny and they're for young people who don't have any flaws at all.)  Stores should hang a disclaimer outside fitting rooms saying that the lighting and mirrors add 25 pounds to your body, even if it's a lie, because some girls pretty much become anorexic for an entire week after trying on clothes.  I was pretty much dieting over the weekend and I just bought 0's and 2's on Friday.   Seriously.  Messed up.  Someone needs to fix this. It jacks my head up.
8.  Other Girls.  You know that song "99 problems but a bitch ain't one?"  Well, maybe that's true for you, but for us, there's usually some girl making us unhappy.  If a girl isn't making you unhappy, you're probably the bitch and you just don't know it.
9.  We Worry SO Much. We are definitely "controllers of our environment".  We need security in all kinds of ways.  Every girl I talk to, when I really listen, what I hear is her need to feel secure.  We worry so much as a result of this. All we want is to know someone loves us, that everything will be ok, and that someone understands.  It's a powerful thing, guys, if you know this about us.  Next time your girl is upset, think "What's she feeling insecure about?"  I swear, it will probably help you out.
10.  We love YOU.  Obviously, right now, I am talking about heterosexual girls....we love you, men.  And you break our hearts.  This is not always your fault; sometimes we break our own hearts.  But we love you no matter what.  We give you so many excuses to be little boys, and what we really want is to be loved and we want you to care, and to show us that you care. I have no doubt that that's what you guys want too, but you should allow us to love you then.  We really are pretty smart.  If you have a girl who loves you, don't take it for granted.  Love her, because you may regret it when she's gone. 

Only One Messiah....Tennessee Says So.

So, a judge in Tennessee ruled this week that you can't name your baby "Messiah" because there was only one.....read this and catch up, if you haven't heard.


http://www.npr.org/blogs/thetwo-way/2013/08/12/211348996/judge-orders-babys-name-changed-from-messiah

Before I state my opinions, I want to make it clear that I would never name my baby Messiah, Jesus, Damien, Satan, Lucifer, Cain, or anything else extremely bad or good.  That's just my personal preference.  Dylan's middle name is Matthew, and that's fine, but that's neutral, and that's my opinion.  Matthew was a disciple.

First of all, I thought when we separated church and state, we separated church and state.  What does "separate" mean?  It means not connected.  So I can't understand why this judge is dumping her personal religious beliefs on this woman.  What if the woman doesn't believe in God?  Which, she probably does, so given that, the judge should care even less, right?  I don't think the State of Tennessee should be getting involved. Sounds like this judge needs something else to worry about.

Part of the reason I don't understand why the state is involved is because I know what names they DO allow you to name your babies.

My uncle is a doctor and used to deliver babies in Tennessee.  He once delivered a baby girl who ended up with the name "Vagina".  He also delivered a little boy who is now named "Orangello" after Orange Jello.  I swear.  True story.  But you can't name your baby Messiah?  I would take the fate of "Messiah" over "Vagina" any day.  Gwyneth Paltrow named her baby "Apple" and I can name mine "Table Chair Chenault", but you can't name a baby Messiah?  It just doesn't make sense, unless this judge is going to start asserting her ridiculous opinions on everyone else as well.  Where do we draw the line? 

I remember a line in "Meet the Parents" when Pam's ex-fiancé, Kevin (Owen Wilson), widdled an alter out of a hunk of wood.  He tells Gaylord Focker why.  He says "Well, Jesus was a carpenter, so I thought, if you are going to follow in someone's footsteps, who better than Christ?"  So given Kevin the Ex's logic from Meet the Parents, I would say this lady is wrong.

On top of the fact that there exists somewhere in the world, a birth certificate from TENNESSEE with the name "Vagina" on it.  Come on. 

Whatcha Got, Monday?

I had a great weekend.  I ran errands, got everything clean (including my awful car), and did every bit of laundry there was to do.  I managed to do this, shop for groceries, AND have fun with the kids.  I also went to hot yoga on Saturday, which always makes me extremely happy.  I am telling you, if you haven't tried it, do it.  It's the second best feeling on the planet.  I forget how to drive a car when I leave hot yoga, I am so relaxed. 

Anyway, my goal on Saturday night was to have everything pretty much accomplished so that I could take the kids to the aquarium on Sunday.  I did, so we went.  The boys had a great time.  They absolutely loved it.  I take them to the zoo constantly, but I've never taken them to the aquarium. They loved the dolphins and Beluga whales.  I think if I were an animal, I think I would be a dolphin, by the way.  They seem so eager to please and to make people happy.  Plus, I have definitely been known to try and save people from the deep end of the ocean.

Before I share pictures, I would like to address something negative about the aquarium (even though it had no bearing on my day and we had a great time).

If you ever want to find out how patient you are, go to the Georgia Aquarium.  Why?  Because a lot of people there have NO MANNERS.  I thought I had just had a bad experience the first time, but it now seems to be the norm.

Among the rude:

1. Rude parents: Even more obnoxious than the rude little bastards who are pushing my children, are their inconsiderate guardians.  I say "guardians" because they seem to do very little parenting.  They allow their children to act like hoodlums because that's exactly how they are behaving themselves.  While a little kid is knocking my child over to see the whale, I guarantee you their jerk of a parent is doing the same thing to me. Not only that, a lot of times, the guardians are pushing their child to the front.  Seriously?  I think we need to go back to Pre-K and learn about sharing and standing in single-file lines.
2. The Childless Adult with the Camera: Dude.  I get it.  You really want to get pictures of every little creature in that building, but you know, there are like 2,000 children here and they can't see past your ass.  Can't you let the short people see?  And to clarify, I am sticking up for the polite children, not the little bastards who are knocking you over.
3. The Skippers: The boys and I were in line to crawl through the Penguin tunnel when a fight broke out behind us.  This lady, whom I SAW skip a bunch of people, was yelling "I was next!  I remember, because I remember her dress!"  She pointed at my dress.  I wanted to say "Where, like three exhibits ago?"  But I didn't.  And maybe it's just me, but saying you remember your place in line because of someone's garment.....not a great argument.  You should just be able to say "because I was behind her", but she couldn't, because she was a liar. 
4. The WORST: Then there was this lady AFTER the penguin line; she didn't have children with her, she was simply there to see the penguins, who was extremely obnoxious.  We all filed out and at the end of the tunnel, I was standing by the exit, helping Carson and Dylan up.  This lady was knocking me over while saying "Excuse me".  I finally snapped.  I turned around and said "Excuse me?  Yes!  Excuse you.  Do you mind?  I am trying to get to my children!  Geez!  Don't worry!  You're going to see the next animal.  It isn't going anywhere."  The lady had a husband and he looked at me with a shocked expression.  UGH.  I was so irritated.  I think when people say "Excuse me" while they do something THEY KNOW is rude, I am just going to start saying "You should excuse yourself, because your manners are PISS POOR!"

I will add one thing.....Carson and Dylan are the most well-mannered children in public.  They have their moments because they are 4, but they are all about the please and thank you's.  I don't let them barge right through people, number one, because I hold their hands.  Number two, they don't act that way because they are extremely passive around these arrogant barbarians.  I am sure they're too afraid to be pushy.  They understand what it means to be polite.

I think that finishing classes, or "Manners 101" should be mandatory for high school.  People are ridiculous.

Anyway, it was a great day, even with the baboon asses.  Here are some pictures:

This is the penguin tunnel

Dylan got a sword and Carson got a game

This is from this morning.  I was doing some exercises and I played airplane
with Dylan.  We both woke up at 4:15 and never went back to sleep, so we had breakfast and
he played while I did crunches and push-ups.




 

Flashback Friday-King Bidgood's in the Bathtub

This was one of my FAVORITE books as a child.  The authors also wrote "The Napping House", which is a little more popular, and "Heckedy Peg", which is also one of my favorites, although it's bizarre.  The artwork is the reason I loved them so much.  If you have children, please get them.  They're a must.

The book is simple.  It's about a king who refuses to get out of the bathtub.  Everyone tries to get him out and they end up doing whatever activity they wanted, with him, in the tub. He fishes, feasts, plays war, masquerades......until someone pulls the drain.

Revolutionary Road

*This is a first, I blogged twice in one day.  Scroll down past this for another entry.  :)


Revolutionary Road

Richard Yates published a book in 1961 called "Revolutionary Road".  If you haven't read it, you should.  At least see the movie.

A short synopsis:

Frank and April Wheeler live in the suburbs of Connecticut in the 1950's.  They have two children and a "perfect life".  They are living the American Dream, and yet, they're not happy.  They're bored.  They feel suffocated.  And until they talk about it, they are living in a silent panic and turmoil within themselves.  Once both characters realize and admit that they're both feeling the same way and they're simply more flamboyant and interesting than their neighbors, they  decide to leave everything and travel the world together, along with their children....but they don't end up leaving in the end because they feel as if they're trapped. Although they long to break the mold, they end up realizing that society has sort of paralyzed them. It has a sad ending that I won't give away, but I will say that it's extremely disturbing.  It's very controversial. 

What's it really about?

The goal of the 1950's was to conform, which is scary in so many ways.  Why?  Because there's beauty in flaws and in something you've never seen before and can't describe.  What's exciting about seeing the same thing every day?  Not only that, but usually conformity is achieved when someone else is in control.  I think it's pretty impressive that Yates saw what was going on and wrote about it as quickly as he did, but then again....he was a writer and he was clearly disturbed by a vanilla society. He could have been feeling suffocated himself.  Maybe he wondered how everyone else whistled and smiled while getting on the train every day to go sit in a cubicle for hours and hours to pay for a home like everyone else's.  Conformity is what everyone wanted after the war and depression, and I can't really blame them.  Look at how the 40's went down.  Plus, everyone yearns for a certain amount of stability; it's only natural.  But then life happens anyway and you quickly realize that everything should be done in moderation and there's nothing human about being stable all the time and it's ok to have faults.  Maybe if life is always stable, you aren't getting out and therefore aren't taking chances and living.  Life can't always be stable, but very rarely is it always chaotic.  There's no such thing as perfection, and so the very idea that people were striving for it, well that must have been a terrible feeling.  Talk about feeling incompetent.  It was unrealistic to take a bunch of people with souls and minds and sex drives and expect it to work out.   Obviously.  Look at all of the books and movies about this era.  The interesting thing about Yates is that, like I said, he published it in 1961.

There is a lot of comfort in conformity, but what happens when you get too comfortable?  I know what happens...just think about it.  What really happens when a person gets too comfortable?  Have you ever seen the movie "Happy Feet"?  The penguin basically gets mushy brain and becomes depressed because he isn't out catching fish anymore, but instead, is simply opening his mouth while the zoo throws them directly into his beak.  Where is the fun in that?  Is it more about the catching of the fish than actually eating it?

Conforming is this: relinquishing something unique in order to become another that already exists.  So it would only be natural to feel suffocated and even violated when you have relinquished the uniqueness that is you, right?

The reason why the book is disturbing is very simple: because the characters are in such serious turmoil about a life that appears to be perfect. Why is this disturbing?  Contradictions are always unnerving-especially when talking about unfulfilled people behind a white picket fence.  The idea that you can't even relax once you get to the top, is extremely unsettling. 

But who said that's the top? That's the point.  You should make your own top. 

Snow Patrol-The Lightning Strike

This is such a good song.  I hadn't heard it in a while and now I am obsessed with it again.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S0BDS0-ZwOw


What if this storm ends?
And I don't see you
As you are now
Ever again

The perfect halo
Of gold hair and lightning
Sets you off against
The planet's last dance

Just for a minute
The silver forked sky
Lit you up like a star
That I will follow

Now it's found us
Like I have found you
I don't want to run
Just overwhelm me

What if this storm ends?
And leaves us nothing
Except a memory
A distant echo

I want pinned down
I want unsettled
Rattle cage after cage
Until my blood boils

I want to see you
As you are now
Every single day
That I am living

Painted in flames
All peeling thunder
Be the lightning in me
That strikes relentless

Top 10-If I Had It My Way.....

1. Pluto would still be a planet. Along with having to say "No, the FIRST 90210," this Pluto monstrosity makes me feel old.  It's a sign of a generational gap, one that I could do without.
2. No one would ever talk about how well Tiger Woods is doing this year, or any other year.  He's Tiger Woods.  Stop being shocked when he's "on fire". Is this a joke that I don't get or are guys seriously surprised and excited?  Did he ever really suck?  Is this comment really more of a plea for Tiger to be as good as he was back in the day?  I don't get it.  Every year, I hear this.
3. Jimmy John's would still use alfalfa sprouts.  I realize that by eating alfalfa sprouts you run the risk of contracting salmonella poisoning, but lettuce isn't the same.  I want the sprouts.
4. People would stop being stupid.  The worst thing about the fact that people are so stupid is that I don't believe that they're all really stupid.  I think people are too lazy to realize what their potential is and they're blind to the fact that they aren't the center of the Universe.  From this, what you end up with is a person who isn't what they think they are, but instead, an idiot who wasted their potential and now spends their time telling everyone why they're smart and always right, when they know deep down that they're truly a dumbass that didn't have to be.
5. People would love even their enemies. I really wish this were true because it would change absolutely everything. 
6. Videogames wouldn't have ever gotten as complex as they did. I miss Mario Brothers. 
7. Tennis players would get a point taken off every time they grunt.  Dude, I can't take it.  I cannot take their grunting.  Yes, I realize that it's a difficult sport and that they are using a lot of power, which naturally propels an obnoxious noise from their body....but I just can't take it. 
8. There would be a lane for semi trucks with a bumper to protect the rest of us.   This may have something to do with the fact that, hmmmm, let's see.... it's stupid to share the road with massive machinery operated by people who are so sleep deprived that they sometimes don't know their name!  Come on, now. 
9. Everything would taste like a Strawberry Fruit Roll-up. And I mean everything. 
10. People could see the big picture rather than getting hung up on the ridiculousness of life.  People would be a lot more interesting and smarter and happier if they could actually see the big picture.  When you see your entire life's worth of goals and you can learn from the lessons that God is throwing you, you are a lot more forgiving of the daily absurdities and inconveniences.  When you look at the entire planet and its numerous functioning systems, you are more likely to give a crap that they are in fact, dysfunctional.  When you have a peace about yourself, your goals, and those around you, you smile.  You can't help but smile and move on when you know that in the grand scheme of things, it's not that big of a deal.  "This too shall pass".

First Day of School

It sounds so cliché to say "time flies", but it's true. I don't know how this happened.  I turned 33 today and my kids are all in school.  So crazy to me.  Once your kids are in school, the time really starts flying, so I will be 40 before I know it.  And I feel like I was 25 a minute ago.  I really don't like to think about it much. 


Getting out the door wasn't as easy as I thought it would be, but that's ok.  It's the first day.  Once we get back into a groove, it'll be good. 

Enjoy your babies, my friends.  It really does fly by.



Here are some pictures:

Carson wanted to be in bed.  Look at my precious angels. :)

Now Carson is awake.  And I'm sorry, but could you eat them?  I could.
You can't see very well, but Dylan has a Superman backpack and Carson
has a Batman backpack.  They both have capes on them that Velcro on and off.

Just a minute ago he was a baby, snuggling in my arms.


 

4-Year-Old Logic

Dylan says the funniest things.  I have to share with you how precious this little boy is. I have a little notepad of things he says because he cracks me up.  This is all from last week, in one night.  He was hilarious.

"Mama, brown cows make chocolate milk and white cows make white milk."


"I am allergic to peas, and that means I cannot have them.  When I am not allergic to peas, that will mean I can have them."


Carson tried my spinach and Dylan said "Carson, did that taste like leaves?"  Ha ha. 

We were talking about my new fruit slicer someone gave me.  I said "You know what? You can also cut boiled eggs, so Carson will love that."  Dylan replied "We can?  You will let me cut the eggs?"  I said "No, I meant YOU in general, like one can. I wouldn't want you to cut yourself, so I don't think I will let you."  Dylan rolled his little eyes and smacked his forehead and said "Mama, you said YOU and that means WE.  So WE can!  Me and Carson CAN cut them!  You said YOU!"  Explain the concept of speaking generally to a 4-year-old.  It wasn't easy.

Later that evening, Carson was sitting on the counter next to me while I loaded the dishwasher.  Carson wanted down and started yelling "Dylan!  Come 'ere!  Give me a boost!  Give me a boost, Dylan!"  Dylan got on his hands and knees like a step stool.  I didn't let him use his brother as a landing strip, but I still thought it was funny.  The boys constantly work together.  It's cute.