The Devil Himself

Chardon, this one is for you....

Let me first state that Chardon and our friend, Lauren, are two bad ass girls.  They just are.  Although we have a lot in common, they are completely different than me in that way and I love them for it.  They would never allow things to happen to them the way I have allowed them to happen to myself, and I get a kick out of these girls.  I am also learning a few things.  So yesterday I was telling Chardon that I love her and Lauren for being this way.  I said I can get mean and run my mouth if someone messes with my friends or family, but if someone comes after me, I always stand there so shocked, I don't know what to say.  They aren’t like that.  With me, it has to register first and then later, I think "I totally should have said that!"  Chardon said she is the opposite, she always says “Why did I say that?  I shouldn’t have said that!” 

For instance, one night at Macos in Buckhead (we were out for my bachelorette party), I was dancing with my girlfriends and I had a crown on my head that said "Bachelorette”—this was our first mistake because it was like a creep-magnet—anyway, we were dancing and this guy kept coming up and grinding on me.  I said nicely "I'm getting married, just here to dance with my girlfriends, would you please mind backing up and not dancing with me?"  He ignored me, so we left.  I came back, he did it again, I was meaner this time.  We had to leave again.  The third time to the dance floor, he grinds up on me again and I turn around and push him as hard as a can to get him off of me.  He SPITS ON MY ARM.  (I may have written about this before, but if so, oh well because it paints a picture.)  I stand there with my arm out, jaw open, not moving or saying a word.  He is just standing there, staring at me, watching me say nothing.  I don't even remember the rest.  I left and cleaned myself up and freaked out about his spit.  When my sister saw this, she immediately ran to a bouncer to tell him and I am pretty sure she screamed at the guy.  Another guy that saw it came up to me after I had wiped it off and he said "That was so wrong.  I told a bouncer and the guy is lucky I'm not beating his ass.  Who the hell spits on a girl?  And you’re getting married?  Wrong."  Anyway, the bouncers threw the guy out....he CAME BACK....they threw him out again.  We left. That guy was a weirdo.

So, back to my conversation with Chardon…..we were talking about a guy that I know yesterday.  I said he's acted funny around me lately and I don't get it.  We think he may like me or something.  He's cool and all, but I mean, as a friend.  Anyway, I said that I would never drink around this person because I wouldn't trust him not to put something in my drink.  Chardon said "Um, yeah.  He would.  Totally."  I then backpedaled and said "But I don't think that he would do it intentionally, I don’t think he would mean to or plan to, I mean, he wouldn't do it sober.  I think he would do it when he was messed up or drunk or something."  Chardon started squealing and saying "BRITTANY!!!!  You could defend ANYONE!  I mean, I know that he would probably drug me and rape me, but he wouldn't do it unless he was drunk. Oh my GOD!   STOP DEFENDING PEOPLE!  OMG!  Listen to what you are saying!!!!"  The rest of what she said was not coherent.  She started laughing hard and said "Britt, you'd defend the devil himself.  You would.  You would try to CONVERT the damn devil!"  Now that was funny.  We both started laughing because it’s true.  There must be a reason that every time my church has ever said anything about Prison Ministry, I feel my hand itching to rise up and volunteer.

What's funny is that I am now working for defense attorneys.

In all seriousness, I know this about myself, and you may think that I shouldn’t be admitting it, but I am transparent.  It doesn’t matter.  Everyone knows it, especially bad people.  I think the problem is that I don’t physically see myself or things happening.  I don’t see someone hurting me with my own eyes and what it physically looks like; it’s like I need a mirror to see my face, to see how I react.  Once at my last job, I watched a guy get screamed and cussed at and I went in the kitchen and cried.  I couldn’t stand watching him being belittled in front of me.  There's something about watching a man being belittled that upsets me.  It's just heartbreaking.  It's like an old person's face when it's sad....horrible.  I wonder if I would have been as upset right away had the guy been belittling me instead of this guy.

Chardon told me that she’s so happy I am smart.  If I weren’t smart and picked up hitchhikers and stuff, I would really be in trouble.  Very true, Chardon.  Very true.  I would never do something stupid like that. 

Have a good day!  I have to get ready for work.