Question 2-Why Do We Like the Bad Boy?

I got this question twice this week and the funny thing is that I have written about it before, mainly because I have wondered why as well.

There is an old song by Gloria Estefan that says "Bad bad bad bad boys, you make me feel so good" and it's kind of spot on.  Oh and P.S. the song sucks.  A lot of men feel as if women complain about being treated like crap and then knowingly run right back to it even when there is someone who will treat them well sitting right in front of them.  I get it.  I'm sorry.  It sucks.  I will say that I don't think that any of us want to be treated like crap, but I do recognize that some of us have a pattern and it has to be infuriating for nice guys to watch.  I know that because I feel the same way when I watch guys keep chasing someone who will only hurt them.  And I think it's important to point out that it isn't just girls who do it.  Nice guys act like they want a nice girl but then sometimes they will find themselves chasing the wrong ones just like we do.  This leads me to the most basic of the theories....

• Some (or most) of us want to be challenged, we like exciting, and we like fun and spontaneous.   Bad boys are definitely this, right?  It doesn't mean that good guys aren't this too, but maybe we fall into the trap of a bad boy because they are a challenge or exciting.   And then maybe they tend to be moodier or make bad decisions or jerk us around and that's just what the aftermath is.  I don't know.  What I can say is that in every girl's head, she knows that it would probably be better to pick a nice, sweet, measured man who is always dependable and always predictable, even with the risk of becoming bored...but for some reason, some of us just never do.  Maybe a lot of us just can't resist the excitement and we aren't attracted to the good boy.  The perfect "bad boy" is a good guy who is exciting and assertive and confident. 

Other theories:

• Sexual attraction. You know how you guys want a lady in the streets and a freak in the sheets?  Well, we really are not that different.  We want to be respected and loved and treated well in the streets but we really don't want to tell you what to do when you're in bed because we want a guy who is quite frankly, going to pick us up and know what to do with us because it's hot.  The nice guys wind up in the friend zone because they kind of put themselves there because they move slower than the asshole or the bad boy. And I know it isn't fair, but sometimes this is the case.  We aren't asking you to assault us, but you can still take charge while respecting us. The guys I knew 15 years ago who never grabbed me and kissed me still haven't grabbed me and kissed me and I wasn't going to do it first because it doesn't appeal to me.  Have you ever noticed that girls say "Why are the nice guys always with bitches"? I wonder if it's because the bad girls pounce them and the roles are reversed.  If you put two nice people together, maybe they will just sit there and not do anything. Every guy I have ever liked has taken initiative and made me realize pretty much right away that he was not going to want to be just my friend. 
• We are Fixers. This is a little more messed up and I have an issue with this because if this is true, then happiness will never be possible.  Women seem to go where we are needed and I think that some of us are so strong that we have no idea what to do with a self-sufficient person and we don't know how to let someone take care of us. There are girls who need to feel taken care of and then there are girls who take care of themselves and therefore, get into a habit of taking care of others. 
• We have no self-esteem.  I struggle with this one as well because I don't think any girl wakes up and says "I deserve nothing, I deserve an ass who treats me like crap", and if they feel like that, it's subconsciously.  That's a hard one to nail.  Do we choose the bad boy because we think we don't deserve the nice guy?  Do we think we are bad and will hurt a nice guy?  Do we feel like we will run all over them and need someone to stand up to us? 
• We view the nice guy as a pushover and we aren't attracted to that. I can tell you that even if this is wrong, which it is because not all nice people are pushovers, the fact that some women think it is 100% true.  Most women will have an issue with this, unless they get off on emasculating a man.  I certainly don't get turned on by treating a man like crap and watching him take it.  Be a nice guy with a backbone.  Don't let us run over you.  
• We are good.  Some of us like to be corrupted.  Plain and simple.  We know we aren't going to do something bad without some influence, so I guess we cave when you bring it on. 

If you are getting the runaround from a girl, I am about to give you the most honest advice I can....consider the possibility of the theories above, but when a girl is torn or confused about you, there is usually some reason why and the attraction is usually off. Be careful not to accept some bullshit excuse and understand that sometimes she's just not into you and she isn't attracted to you.  Maybe she does like jerks, but in that case, consider it a compliment.  I am not proud to say it, but I have told my girlfriends things like "I'm not attracted to him" or "I can't imagine kissing him" and yet I never gave that reason to the guy.  Just keep that in mind. 

Question 1-Why Are Women Moody?

So this is the first part of a series I am doing where men get to ask me questions and I try to answer them.  Why?  Because it will be fun. 

One of my friends sent me this link....

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-2764030/Rotten-weather-friends-social-media-updates-husbands-just-wont-listen-Why-women-spend-10-days-YEAR-bad-mood.html

If you don't want to read it, that is a shame because it's funny.  Basically, a study revealed that women spend 10 days out of the year in a bad mood.  The list of triggers include the following, and I may have added commentary:

Being overweight 
Partner not listening 
Feeling under the weather 
Weather/ bad weather 
Not having enough money 
Technology e.g. internet crashing / computer not working
Feeling undervalued
No one helping with anything
Time of the month
PMT (I don't even know what this is...)
Having nothing to wear (Yeah, because the 72 pairs of shoes count as nothing.)
Having a bad hair day 
Keeping on top of housework / washing 
A boring life 
Heavy workload 
The traffic 
Colleagues not pulling their weight 
Being hungry 
Children not listening
Public transport being late
Hating your job 
Waking up with a spot 
Knowing what to cook for dinner every night 
Your boss putting pressure on you 
Rubbish on TV (This is hilarious)
Ungrateful children 
All the hot water being used up in the morning 
Your friends' Facebook updates 
Going through menopause 
Colleagues being late for work 
No one making you a cup of tea (This is my favorite.  I can't stand when no one makes me a cup of tea, stupid bastards!)
Breaking a nail Ha ha ha ha ha

Ok, so my friend asked me to write about why women are always in a bad mood. 

First of all, we are not always in a bad mood and this study is ridiculous; I certainly am not always in a bad mood.  I would pay you money to find 10 people who would say I am moody.  I would also pay you money to find 25 men who are, but then I would be broke. We secretly believe that you guys suffer from "man periods" just as often as you think we are moody and on ours.  Every man I have ever been in a relationship with has been moodier than me, so it comes down to what kind of man or woman you are.  You can be a glass-half-full or glass-half-empty kind of person, no matter what your gender is.

Everyone has a bad day, or a bad moment or a bad period in their life, but if someone is chronically grouchy, I can only think of three reasons why and here they are.....

1. Hormones. Try to understand the power of hormones, men.  The only reason that I believe and sympathize with women who struggle with hormonal imbalances is because I have taken birth control and thought I might kill someone or at least punch someone in the face.  I have two sets of twins, so obviously, there is a SEVERE reason why I have basically never been on hormones for any decent amount of time....the reason is because I turn into an angry person and I have headaches 4 days out of a week.  Hormones make me very, very sick.  I was on the pill a couple of years ago and I only took them for 11 days before one of my friends told me to stop immediately.  I felt like I was going to climb out of my skin.  I felt hot, I felt uncomfortable and I seriously didn't feel like myself.  I felt like I was going to scream, all the time.  Logic didn't work.  Nothing helped.  And the crappy thing about it was that I KNEW that wasn't me and I knew that I wasn't making sense but I still couldn't stop being aggravated.  I have also been pregnant twice.  Both times I turned into someone who could watch extremely sad things and not even shed a tear, whereas, I am usually going to cry during Beaches or some chick flick because that's just a normal response to someone, you know, dying? I was hard as nails.  Then when you have your baby, you cry for stupid reasons, like maybe your toothbrush bristle bent the wrong way.  It takes months to get back to normal.  Do not underestimate hormones.  And if you suspect they are a problem,  persuade her to get her hormones checked. 
2. Maybe consider that she really doesn't like you, you irritate the shit out of her, or you really pissed her off because you are a complete horse's ass. I know that whenever I have been pissed off about something and I am upset with a guy, there is a legitimate reason. When I look back at the crap that pissed me off when I was married or in a relationship, I could LOGICALLY tell you why I was pissed off and it never had anything to do with anything else. Sometimes you guys miss the fact that we really are logical and we aren't being emotional...we need something. Too many times you realize it when it's too late, so don't do that.  Don't assume we are just being moody.  
3. She's just a bitch.  Sorry, but there are some pretty miserable women out there.  If you are just now bitching about it and you have done literally everything you can to make her happy, sorry, dude.  You chose wrong.  There are some happy girls out there who don't give a damn whether it's sunny or raining, they go to the gym when they feel like their ass is fat, they lift their friends up and don't bash other women, they don't give a shit how much money you make, what kind of car you drive....you just chose a Debbie Downer.  There are a lot of studies about how happiness is genetic and there are people who genetically struggle seeing things positively and who just seem to suck at life. 

11 Practical Ways to Get Over Someone

It's hard to get over someone you love because there's a part of you that doesn't want to get over it and won't let go.  Why? Because you're afraid you won't love like that again.  Getting over someone is like having your snuggly security blanket taken away and it sucks. I have been one to wear my heart on my sleeve, but I recently realized that when you are getting over someone, that's a really dumb thing to do.  It's best to create a suit of armor and I have come up with a list of ways to do that.  And while I appreciate all of the hard core advice like "you deserve better" or "love yourself first", none of that helps when you're driving down the road and it hits you and you're all alone.  And what do you do with that advice when you already know that you deserve better or already love yourself?  It's like knowing you'll love again.  Knowing that you will love again doesn't help you when you miss that someone because you know there isn't anyone like that person.  It does nothing when you're in your bed in the dark and feel your heart breaking. There's a lot of advice out there.  Some say to have sex with someone else (totally not me), some people say block and delete on social media (maybe), but I have another list and I think it's totally practical. 

You have to create a little suit of armor against those mind tricks and emotional triggers, and this is how you do it.....

1.) Listen to rap. Put the sad songs down and walk away. It's physically impossible to cry or be emotional when you hear things like "I got that ho Tivo'ed". Go ahead and try. You can't. Just remember, ain't nobody crying to 2 Chainz.

2.) Watch funny movies. Don't watch things like "The Notebook" or anything with Meg Ryan. What the hell is wrong with you? Why don't you go down to the local pound too and attach yourself to some puppies who are about to be euthanized.  Maybe you should also pour some salt in your eyes just for kicks.  The objective here at this point in time is to not feel anything.  Ryan Gosling will only make you feel like shit. 

3.) Think of the things that irritated you about the person, and only those things. Every time you think something good, counteract it with the one thing that annoyed you the most. Then think about the fact that there exists a person who doesn't do that. 

4.) Get angry. I'm not an angry person, so this is hard for me, but I have found that it sure as hell beats crying. You want to stay pissed until you don't care anymore because it's safer that way. The second you get sad, you lose your head and start thinking about the things you miss and loved about the person. Don't go there. 

5.) Think about how you get to have another awesome first kiss.  Don't think about this right away because you will only cry, but eventually you won't.  Tell yourself the guy will probably look like Gerard Butler, even if you know you'd have a better chance at finding a leprechaun. 

6.) Keep moving. Be healthy and keep busy.  

7.) Throw yourself into work. (Or whatever).  Make that money.  Can't do that when you're crying. 

8.) Accept that you'll probably always love the person in a way. So what. I still like my jellies from the 80's, doesn't mean I should still wear them.

9.) Give yourself a certain amount of time to cry. Then stop. I have done this.  I have said "Brittany, you have one day to get it out and then you're done."  It works. 
10.) DO NOT FORGET about that one thing the person did that hurt you.  I am a very forgiving person so I have to work at this.  When you are feeling like "Well, it's ok.  It's not so bad," NO.  Don't do that.  Remember that thing that broke you and don't let go of it.  You can let go of it when you're indifferent.  When you can successfully play Naked Golf with the person and feel nothing, then you can let go of it.
11.) Take care of yourself....Allow yourself one night where you just get white girl (or boy) wasted, then wipe your pukey self off, get up and go to the gym.  And take a shower, preferably.  You stink for sure.

Pictures

I had a great weekend. I hung out with the kids the whole time and babysat a friend's little boy Friday and Saturday night. The boys ADORE him. Although he will be 2 next month, Dylan still thinks he needs to feed him and baby him. They both snuggle him and love on him. So cute! Anyway, I ran errands, caught up on laundry, and went to hot yoga and watched kids on Saturday. 

Yesterday the boys and I went to church, had brunch, went to the zoo and then had dinner at Atlantic Station. My friend, Katie, came along and told me at the end of the day how blessed I am to have them, which means they wrapped her around their fingers. Haha. They make everyone fall in love. And make no mistake about it, I'm totally conceited about my boys because they're honestly that sweet. Like angels. And hilarious and cute!!! 

By the way, I'm really starting to have a problem with Dylan's attire. He pretty much will only wear Superman clothes, and it's a good thing he has an entire wardrobe. But on the weekends, he makes sure that I have washed his UnderArmor Superman shirt and he refuses to take it off. Even while getting ready for church yesterday,  I told him he had to wear something else and then had to compromise and let him wear it underneath his church clothes. When we walked out of church, he lifted his regular shirt so everyone could see the S underneath his clothes. He walks around so proud. And did I mention that he won't take off the cape? I could eat him. 

Saturday morning at Starbucks

Admiring the bikes.....

Flexin' his muscles....

The Zoo:

Atlantic Station.....

Working

This week I will only be focusing on one thing and that's work. However, when I sit for too long, I start to fidget.  I fidgeted myself into drawing this yesterday.....

Top 10 Things You Should Know Before You Date a Single Mother

1. She doesn't have time to dick around, so take it as a compliment that she is sharing her time with you. My time is precious. Not just my life in general, but my time with and without my children.  I have to squeeze a lot of stuff in when I don't have the kids, whether it's running errands or having fun.  If I were to date, I would ask myself one simple question....."Is he Friday night worthy?" Because that's what it comes down to.  If you are co-parenting, you get every other weekend free to hang out with someone and if you're a new person, you have to compete with those she knows she already likes.  Be worthy or don't bother.  Some mothers get NO time to themselves.  Respect her free time and work around it or it won't work.  Single mothers have to jump through a lot of hoops to make time for a guy, so you should be willing to try and do the same for her.   Know which weekends she has the kids, doesn't have the kids, etc.  
2. If she's a good mom, accept that you won't be number one. Really think about this one.  Her kids should come first.  You don't want a woman who doesn't put her kids first.  Mothers who don't are flaky.   
3. She has a lot going on. Just because she isn't texting you every five seconds doesn't mean she doesn't like you.  It means she has more on her plate than she can even describe and she is trying to hold it together and be strong for more than just herself.  You can't get your feelings hurt.  And if she is actually good about getting back to you or texting you or checking in, you mean a lot to her because it isn't an easy thing to do and it takes a lot of effort. If a guy ever gets mad at me for that, he can just pretty much lose my number.  I don't have time for nor do I need another thing to handle and because I am fine alone; I have no problem freeing myself of nuisances. 
4. She has more to consider before even starting to date you, which means she's already committed more than you might realize. Before a mom goes on a date, she already has in her head what she SHOULD have in her life and obviously she is looking for something, or she wouldn't be going on the date in the first place.  Now sometimes she is looking for "the one" and sometimes she just wants something not complicated and to have fun. Contrary to popular belief, women don't all want marriage and sometimes they've been burned. One thing is for sure though, single moms have learned a lot, they know a lot, chances are they've been through a lot, they have analyzed and considered everything in their life before even meeting you.  Don't shake her world up without consideration if she likes you and continues to see you.  Don't screw around with something precious like a single mother.  She has other people needing her to be at her best.  I don't mean that you have to propose the first night you go out, but what I mean is that you need to understand that she is risking a lot by giving you a chance.  And then there are circumstances where you don't stand a chance to get into her life because she doesn't want anything serious.  It all depends.... 
5. Not all women who have children are looking to be supported and are not out looking for a daddy.  When I got divorced, everyone said to find someone rich who can afford four kids because a person like that won't care that I have four kids.  I was like "What?  NO! Screw that! I'll do it on my own!"  I don't want something like money to dictate who I love and it shouldn't dictate the way someone feels about me. I want to give myself options and take the load off whoever I end up loving. I'm not backing myself into a corner where I need or have to find someone.  Ok, now that isn't to say that some mothers don't want or need support or to find a daddy and I am not saying that there is anything wrong with this if they want to go that route, but don't assume you know what she wants.  I'm actually offended when a man assumes this. There are some women who are hellbent on doing things themselves, like me.  I always find it humorous when a guy is intimidated that I have four kids.  Sorry, but I do.  I feel like saying "Excuse me, who the hell are you and why are you assuming I would even LET you support me, my children or pay my bills?  Get the F out of here."  Like, way to put the cart before the horse, random person who just met me.  You don't even get to meet my kids, much less help me raise them. THIS, I've got. 
6. Some mothers have a guard up and it doesn't mean that we are bitches.  There are a lot of freaks out there.  We are protecting more than just ourselves.  Put the time in it takes for us to trust you or just go away.   
7. Understand her arrangement. For example, my children have a father.  That relationship must be respected and if it isn't, there is no way in hell I will be with you.  That isn't to say that you can't be involved in a mother's life, but you have to consider the situation and be respectful and it's probably going to take time, at least, I think it should.  However, there are a lot of situations where kids don't have fathers at all and if you are the only man present, you are more than likely going to be the dad.  Understand the circumstances.  I also think that people rush things too often.  When there are children involved, people should take their time and use their heads. 
8. Don't assume there will be drama/be ready to deal with drama. It depends on the situation.  Some parents get along and co-parent well, some don't, sometimes there are just occasions where you have issues.  If you are thinking about getting into a dramatic situation, well, you'd better love that person, that child, and you'd better be stronger or just as strong as the woman.  She's probably needing a break by now.   If you aren't, don't bother.  And if you have met a girl who has a pretty decent situation, well, that's awesome. It makes a world of difference.
9. Consider that she may or may not want to get married and have children again, or consider the fact that she does.  Don't neglect that conversation.  It's important to know where you both stand on that before anyone gets attached. 
10. Good mothers know about unconditional love. This is perhaps the single most awesome thing about being with a GOOD mother. Having a child changes you because you learn about patience and love.  We know how to love unconditionally.  If we weren't nurturing before, we are now.
    
     

Why Everyone Needs to Have Their Heart Broken

 
Before reading this, understand that I am not referring to my marriage and divorce here in this post.  Marriage and divorce are so much more complicated and going through a divorce no matter which side you are on just straight up sucks and the grieving process is not like a break-up when you are never married.  The death of a marriage is worse than you can imagine, even if you are polite about it. 

So now that I said this, I have to say something less than flattering about myself, but it is the truth and I may or may not be unique....not a single time that I ever broke up with anyone did I ever cry or feel an emotion of any kind except relief and the desire to celebrate my freedom.  I realize that it's because when I get to the point when I am done, what it really means is that I have been done for a while and I just didn't break up with the person until I was past the point that I cared anymore...but still, I felt nothing in what I guess was a delicate situation.  I would say a situation where a guy is crying and begging and pleading for you to love him again is delicate, right?  I have felt nothing when this has happened....not anger, not resentment, not guilt, not love, not sadness, not mercy, just absolute indifference.  I didn't even feel the urge to say "You should've listened to me" because even that would have taken too much effort or thought for a person who just simply didn't matter to me anymore.  My attitude was that they treated me badly, so oh well, they made their bed and they have to lay in it and watch me live my life, which will be more awesome without them in it.  I didn't ever feel like I should have to explain again why I was done because I had already said it 4,000 times during the relationship.  I couldn't understand why they seemed so surprised that I didn't love them anymore since I had warned them every time they hurt me that one day I would feel nothing and I would walk out with no expression on my face. And for how sweet I can be, I have to admit, that is creepy. 

The bad thing about indifference is that you come off as cold (but you aren't even that warm, honestly) and when you end something with someone, you need to be compassionate even if you really don't care.  Why?  Because they still do.   I broke up with one guy on the phone.  He sent me flowers with a bear in it, which I ended up running over with a car while my friends and I laughed.  I broke up with one person by walking over to a payphone and telling someone to pick me up....he didn't even get the two words he deserved.  In fact, the only thing he got was a U-Haul out front and getting dragged across the floor as he clung to my ankles, begging me to forgive him.  I never said one word and the only noise that was made over his crying was the door slamming behind my ass.

Why am I writing this?  For two reasons....

1.) It really doesn't matter who is at fault because in the end, we should all try to empathize and be more compassionate.

and

2.) To warn people to take care of the people they are in relationships with.  Love is a gift and you don't want to push someone to the point of indifference.  They can't help it when they go ignored that long.  


The truth is, I never understood how it felt to be on the losing end of a break-up.  I had never been left, broken up with and I had never had my heart broken.  Once I finally experienced my heart being broken, I finally understood how my ex-boyfriends felt, regardless of whether they deserved me leaving them or not.  What I told myself when I broke up with someone is "Why is he angry?  He is the one who screwed up. Why should I have to deal with his anger, after everything else???"  Now I understand that anger comes from the frustration that you love someone who refuses to love you back or who is incapable.  I told myself "He should have listened.  I warned him."  Yes, but people aren't perfect and unfortunately, knowing that they screwed up only makes them feel crappier because they realize that they could have stopped it from happening.  Sometimes we are our own worst enemies.  I told myself "He doesn't love me, if he did, he never would have treated me badly."  This is true and yes, I totally deserved better, but now I feel compassion for people who don't know how to love rather than completely disregarding the effed-up feelings they do have.  I am thankful that I know what love is and that I know how to love wholeheartedly.  How horrible would it be to be self-destructive and to destroy things you love?  

What I have learned is that the heart is delicate and I will forever be careful when I have one in my hands.  If I don't feel the same way, I will never let it go far.  If I need to end things, I will never do it over the phone, by text or by post-it. (Sex and the City reference, lol.)  I will always try to understand that regardless of my beliefs or reasons for ending something, another person is hurting, that it is a  delicate situation, and that it really does hurt like hell to be heart broken.

If you have been given the blessing of love, treat it with care.  Don't assume that it will always be there.  Once a person becomes indifferent, they can't come back to you even if they wish they could. Trust me.  I love with everything I have, and I have been there....cold, expressionless, without even the desire to say "Screw you."  

Mason Jars

Ok, so I am about to change your life.  I can't take credit for inventing this but I will take credit for being the bomb for telling you about it.  Ha ha.  I was on Pinterest all weekend and I finally got around to trying some of the things I had pinned.  I bought a bunch of Mason Jars and made three different things with them. 

First, I made porridge for my breakfast for the entire week.  I added flax seeds and I only did frozen raspberries.  I also stick mine in the microwave for about 40 seconds or so.  I think it tastes like cobbler.  It is SOOOO freaking good.  I eat it with a boiled egg (I boil an entire carton at the beginning of the week and stick them all in the fridge.)

Food Babe's Parfait Porridge

 

 

 

These are the ingredients for one serving:

• ¼ cup oat groats rinsed and drained (I used oats)
• ¼ cup ezekiel cereal, muesli, or ¼ cup steel or rolled oats (for texture) (I used muesli)
• 1 tsp of currants (I didn't use these at all)
• sprinkle of cinnamon
• 4 ounces unsweetened almond milk
• 1 tsp of chia seeds (optional) (I did use them)
• 1 cup fresh or frozen fruit of your choice (Like I said, I used raspberries.  SO good.)

 

Instructions

1. In a "to go" glass container of your choice: Place oat groats, ezekiel cereal/oats, cinnamon, currants, chia seeds, and almond milk in the container and stir
2. Top mixture with fresh or frozen fruit
3. Let mixture sit in fridge overnight or up to three days in fridge

 

 

Ok, so then I made three snacks with the jars.  I put hummus at the bottom of some jars and stuffed carrots and celery in them.  Then I made some with peanut butter and apples and peanut butter and celery.  Honestly, it looked cute but I cut the stalks too short and the apple slices were hard to get out.  I probably won't do this again.  Instead, I will just pack them in baggies and little containers for the dip.

 

Are you ready for the best part?  First of all, the reason that Mason Jars are awesome is because they keep the salad fresher due to the fact that they are glass rather than plastic.  Also, when you pour them out, the ingredients are in order!  BRILLIANT!  Ok, so here is where I screwed up and had to go back to the store, so keep this in mind....the jars for my breakfast needed to be smaller, but my salad wouldn't fit in the smaller ones.  I needed the largest ones. Buy the biggest ones.

 

 

 

So the trick here is that the dressing is at the bottom. You don't have to cart around a bottle of dressing or leave it in the fridge at work.  You create a barrier of veggies on top of the dressing, then add cheese and protein and then the lettuce on top.  When you pour it out, it's all in order!  Right?  Coolest ever.  You can prep a few at a time. I am super picky about salad so just Google recipes or do whatever you want.  This week I did baby kale, pecans, grilled chicken, dried cranberries and a little goat cheese.  I only do olive oil with salt and pepper on my salad because when I eat salad dressing, I then have to eat like a bottle of Tums for the rest of the day and personally, I hate eating chalk.

I also made:

• Frozen Greek yogurt blueberries. Dip the blueberries in Greek yogurt, put them on parchment paper on a pan, stick in the freezer, throw in a giant Ziploc bag and done.  They're so good. 
• Mini turkey meatloaves (in muffin pans), fresh green beans and sweet potatoes....everything baked at the same time.   I put each dinner in a container for the next week for myself.
• I made black bean vegan brownies, which I know sound gross, but they are so delicious!  Totally dairy free (I am lactose intolerant, so this was awesome) AND they have protein in them.  I used dark chocolate cocoa powder and dark chocolate chips.  I will post that recipe later because I had to make adjustments to it. 
• Finally, I made a veggie spaghetti sauce in the crock pot for Lindsey.  She loves pasta but I hate how she completely rejects vegetables, so what I did was finely chop all of the veggies except the zucchini and yellow squash.  I put the squash and zucchini through the Veggetti.  If you don't have one, they are awesome...get one.  You wind the veggie through it and it makes it resemble spaghetti.  So anyway, my idea was that when Lindsey eats the pasta, she will eat the veggies pretty much unknowingly because they are mixed with the pasta.  She likes it and hasn't complained yet. One of my favorite meals is zucchini "pasta" with turkey meatballs and spaghetti sauce.  Of course, the tomatoes make me choke all night because I am probably bleeding from an ulcer but you know, maybe you won't have that issue.

Ta da!  That's it!

Bitches love Pinterest. 

Love, Whatever.

I'm at a point where I don't know what I'm more afraid of....loving madly again with the possibility of getting hurt again or never loving again and staying safe.  When I am alone, I am in control of my feelings for the most part and I'm balanced. When I'm in love I lose a part of myself, the part that loves myself....the smart side. At least that's what it seems like to me. 

Maybe when you're in love you shouldn't feel off balance. Maybe that's always the problem with the way I love. I get lost in a storm and I'm all alone when I land.  I really don't want someone to sweep me away in a whirlwind again if they aren't going to catch me.  But most of all, I don't want to hold an umbrella and fly away on purpose expecting not to fall on my ass. 

That's all. I realized today that I'm very confused. 

Throwback Thursday-Love Gwen

I was obsessed with this CD and what's weird is that it's about 10 years old.  I love Alice-inspired videos.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=yWA4uJOXF-g

Creativity Creep

Last night the boys and I were in the driveway getting in the car and we saw an airplane in the sky. They asked me what it was, I told them an airplane, but they wanted it to be a space ship with aliens in it so I said ok.  While we were in the car, they talked about aliens and what they think they're like and asked me if I thought they were nice. I told them I thought they were nice if they exist. Then I asked them if they knew what it was to use their imagination. Dylan said "yes, it means that you pretend." I told them never to stop using their imagination. I told them that people who forget how to play and use their imagination are grouchy and unhappy.  They said they never want to be grouchy.

This article ties in.....

http://www.newyorker.com/books/joshua-rothman/creativity-creep

Labor Day Pics

I finally did something I've been meaning to do for about a year. I went to Sky Gym for an aerial silk class and I loved it. Sure, you feel like you've been assaulted the next day but flying on a ribbon is totally worth it. 

One of my best friends and I took my oldest twins to Six Flags yesterday. I hadn't been to Six Flags since '96 Olympics when I was VISITING Atlanta. I was 15. Sooooo needless to say, it has changed a lot. 

Great weekend!!!!