Christmas Confessions

This is the most creative thing I have done.

Last week our Elf on a Shelf, Jingles, was placed in a glass bowl in the foyer.  The next day he was there again and Dylan said "He didn't move!"  I said "Wow, he must have really been comfy there!  Maybe he has magic, invisible water and he's taking a bath!"  Dylan giggled. Crisis averted.  This brings me to my first confession......

I suck at Elf on a Shelf.  I pass out with the boys most nights, which means I don't get back up to set him up without little eyes on me.  I have asked Lindsey to help me with it, but she forgets too.  Most mornings I come downstairs, quickly strangle the poor thing and place him somewhere stupid, like around a bottle of wine or sitting on the couch.  Look kids!  Jingles wants to drink!  Once last week, he was sitting on the paper towel roll.  OH yeah!!!  That's fun.  Who doesn't want a paper tower throne?  Jingles is just lucky he doesn't get thrown across the room to land at random.  

I haven't watched Elf yet. It's my favorite, just like smiling is to Buddy, but I still feel like it's August.  I don't know how it's December 10th already and I have no time, I stay so busy.

I answer the phone "Buddy the elf, what's your favorite color?" as many times as possible.  I would say I have a quota and it's something like as many times as I possibly can.  

Last Christmas by WHAM! has been my favorite Christmas song since I was 5 years old.  

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E8gmARGvPlI

I shop and wrap at the last minute.  I still think it's August, remember?  My kids used to get nervous that there weren't any presents until right before Christmas, but they know how I roll now.  I get in, I get out, and do not at all consider this procrastination.    

I don't have outside lights.  By the time I would get them up, judging on how much time I have, it would be February. 

I have a fake tree. There are two reasons for this.....I can't imagine me putting a tree up alone without pulling a Clark Griswald and breaking a window.  I am 5'3.  I am pretty sure I need a man to help me.  The other reason I have a fake tree is because you can put a fake tree up the day after Thanksgiving, and since I look like Scrooge not having lights on the outside of my house, it's probably a good thing to do as soon as possible.  If it weren't for my tree, I would still be thinking it's August.

I LOVE watching my daughter's Christmas recital.  This year she danced to Mariah Carey, All I Want for Christmas Is You. (Another favorite)

And I secretly want to dress Carson up as an Elf.  Last night we watched Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer and he said "Hermie looks like me, except I don't have a hat and my name is Carson!"  

I am taking some time off to be with the kids this Christmas, which means I am really focusing on work right now.  I have what, 2 weeks?  No problem.

Just 14 days of dealing with Jingles.