Caging Yourself

"What would I do without your smart mouth
Drawing me in, and you kicking me out
Got my head spinning, no kidding, I can't pin you down
What's going on in that beautiful mind
I'm on your magical mystery ride
And I'm so dizzy, don't know what hit me, but I'll be alright"

-John Legend, All of You

 

 

 

I love the verse of the song above because I know without a doubt, any man who would truly understand me and love me for who I am would probably say something close to it.  I feel like I am irritatingly complicated to the wrong person, simple to a clueless person, and beautifully complex to the right person. I have known men who fear me and lock me up, I have known men who think I am super easy to please-this makes me just feel alone and like I have to stuff parts of me, and then there have been a few who really get me.  They both scare me and comfort me the most. 

A guy I know once said to me "I know how to handle you because I know you can't be handled.  I'd let you out of your cage."  That stopped me in my tracks.  I realized then that the only guys who will ever really get me are guys who are exactly like me.  I have only met a few and they've all been important to me.  The problem though with free spirits is that they're afraid of being locked up, and when there is someone who would never lock you up sitting in front of you, it's the ultimate commitment, and therefore, they both end up flying right past each other out of fear.  One of my friends quoted "Breakfast at Tiffany's" on Facebook last week and it's really so poignant.  I had never really thought about how while trying to stay free, you can actually pin yourself down.   "You call yourself a free spirit, a wild thing, and you're terrified somebody's going to stick you in a cage. Well, baby, you're already in that cage. You built it yourself."

Everyone should feel free to be who they are, whether you're the type of person who sits in one place or you're a free spirit who likes to feel the air on your back.  Everyone deserves a mate that looks at them in awe, who takes them for exactly who they are, and finds beauty in their imperfections.  But if you are a free spirit, you have to rest your wings long enough to find someone to fly with you.