I am in my 30’s and at this age, there are A LOT of married people, both men and
women, who tell me that they are miserable and want out of their
marriages. I really try to stay
neutral and listen most of the time. By no means do I support divorce frivolously, but I also don’t disregard or judge
those who are unhappy. I try to tell
people what it is like on the other side and what you should prepare for since
people typically tend to think that their issues will all go away if they get
divorced. Some do, sometimes it is worth it, but new issues also pop up and those are the things I try to inform people about. Divorce is not something to
take lightly and it should be a last resort. Sometimes, yes, divorce is
necessary and the situation is bad. And then
other times, I think people are just bored and thinking that the grass is
greener on the other side.
My advice is really very simple and I am sorry that I have
to be so curt. #sorrynotsorry
To the women: Be
prepared to be ALONE and do it ON YOUR OWN, or don’t do it. Don’t expect to find a perfect guy who will
fix your issues and don’t let that be your plan; that is a recipe for
disaster. Look at being single as a growing
experience for yourself because if you are expecting Prince Charming to come
along, you will more than likely be disappointed. Also, be prepared, you will be attacked by an enormous amount of penis that you more than likely won’t be interested
in. And then when you are
semi-interested, you weigh your interest against other factors—STD’s, liars,
cheaters, Commitment-phobes and Stage 5 Clingers. When you weigh these factors against your
love for Netflix and your comforter, that’s when you go home alone. I assure you, I am only happy and enjoying my
life as a single person because I am alone. I am not saying it’s impossible to find the
right person, but you’d better have yourself straight first so you know what
you want and don’t repeat mistakes and fall into bad situations. Also, real heartbreak comes in the form of
seriously and truly loving someone for all the right reasons. And then guess what! That sucks too! Why?
Because even that has its problems.
Bottom line, learn to be happy with yourself. If not, you will more than likely wind up
miserable. One more thing….if you are
one of these married women complaining about your fat, bald husband who bores
the shit out of you, well, just a tip….single men are also often bald and
fat.
To the men: True
story: I was out and a married man was hitting on me. After I was a bitch to him because I am not a
home wrecker, I was nicer and thought I would help the guy out….I told him to
go pay attention to his wife because he will not be getting laid on the reg like
he is imagining. Another guy wanted
advice and I gave it again. It was the
last time I heard from him about the issue because I was too honest….I said “Look, you are middle aged. You have a lot of baggage. You aren’t 20 years old anymore and you are
not going to be slappin’ ass every weekend like you think you are.” Guys, all I am saying is that you might want
to consider the fact that your wife has been picking up your socks and washing
your underwear for 15 years. You might
not be as awesome as you think. I am
always a little skeptical when a man says his wife is such a bitch and he was
perfect….right. I always wonder what his
wife would say.
A note for both sexes:
Some of you are crazy, so you should take into consideration that you have
already found someone who puts up with you.
Don’t assume there are tons of fish in the sea that will tolerate your
excessive gas and messiness and weird idiosyncrasies that may drive someone
else nuts. My point is, consider the
fact that someone else loves you and you might not be so perfect.
Love is a gift, not an obligation.
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