Gravity

Lately I have felt like I have so many balls in the air that if I take one wrong step, they're all going to come crashing down around me.  For instance, I woke up this morning and every joint in my body was aching and I thought "NO!  Now everything will fall apart!"  If I get sick, it takes days to catch everything up.  And as much as I try to roll with the punches and laugh and smile and blow things off, every single aspect of my life has some kind of consequence if I do it incorrectly or not on time.  Most days I feel like my main goal is to keep everything at bay so I won't cry about it or get yelled at by someone later.

I know that balancing life is hard for everyone, in fact, I would be willing to say that it's THE hardest lesson for someone to learn.   Life changes constantly as do your roles, your abilities and your responsibilities.  I feel like I have always been silly, I like to have fun and laugh, I am definitely a dreamer.  Because of this, I feel like I am grasping for gravity on a daily basis.  I feel like I am looking for anything that I can to keep me focused and planted on the ground.  I make lists, I set alarms on my phone, I have an app for everything....but if you don't use these tools because you're too busy, that's a real problem.

I'll adjust.  It's not easy though. I had a crappy week last week and felt like I was drowning in a mess, in pretty much every way, and got caught up over the weekend...that was awesome.  Now I will probably get sick and get behind again. That seems to be how it works. 

Where is Mary Poppins when you need her?  I need Julie Andrews in a jar.

Weekend Recap

I had a great weekend with the kiddos.  I rested Friday night and the kids played.  Actually, I watched "When Harry Met Sally" and fell asleep and Logan told his dad that I had watched "When Sally Met Henry."  Classic.  Haha.

Saturday morning  I went to the gym and then I picked up Subway and took the kids to the playground.  After they burned off some energy, we went home and chilled at the house the rest of the day.  Yesterday I cleaned my house and played with the kids.  We made Christmas cookies and right before decorating them, I realized that I hadn't bought icing.  The sprinkles can't stick without icing, so BACK into the car we went at 8:30 last night to buy icing.  It was worth it; the boys loved decorating them....or should I say eating icing straight from the tub?  I pretended not to see. 

Carson decorating

They are holding hands!  Aren't they cute?

Dylan....I could eat his cheeks!!!

Flashback Friday-When I'm Low, Dylan McKay

Thank you to whoever I took this from on Tumblr.  Those
WERE the good old days. :(

Sometimes when I am feeling low, I like to watch 90210.  All the world can be in chaos, but Brandon Walsh and Dylan McKay seem to make it all better.  I know it sounds silly, but I am not the only one....all of us girls (at least mine) feel the same way. It was such a good, terrible show!

Three years ago, I was given all ten years on DVD.  It was awesome!  I was up in the middle of the night with the boys for months and how did I deal with the sleep deprivation?  I was happily watching 90210. 

And I am sorry, but this song was awesome, even if Ray DID hit Donna. 

http://youtu.be/csATriX8Ed0

I really want one of these T-shirts......

This is the best....this was a great episode.

HAHA!

Have a great Friday!  I am so ready for the weekend.

-Britt

Hump Day Top 10.....On Thursday (oops)

I forgot that it was Wednesday yesterday.  Seriously, I did.  I have been so tired, I barely know my middle name, much less the day of the week.  And I was kidding....it's Elizabeth.  :)

I am not trying to sound like Scrooge, but seriously, I am already sick of Christmas and it isn't even December yet.  Luckily though, I couldn't come up with 10 reasons that I am already irritated with Christmas this year, so the other 4 are things I am excited about.

1. It's about Jesus, but we've all forgotten about that. We spend ridiculous amounts of money on crap we don't need, which is ironic since Jesus was a poor man and came to Earth that way for a reason.....to teach us that money, power and greed is NOT what life is about.  But we are humans and we are stupid, so what do we do?  We go into debt buying crap we can't afford and ultimately distract ourselves from God and Jesus' message.  I am not saying I don't partake in presents, but everything about the season not pertaining to Jesus' birthday really is a distraction, which is the hardest part about being a Christian....staying focused and on the right path.  I am an easily distracted person anyway, so when it comes to God, I know that I am bound to struggle keeping my eyes on him and not all of the other crap in the world.  So thanks a lot, Santa, Christmas music, cookies, trees and twinkle lights. 
2. People who decorate THANKSGIVING DAY and the day after.  They are overachievers and they aggravate me.  Come on, people.  It's like they're the damn Who's in Who-ville, singing Christmas carols in July.  Weirdos. 
3. Stressed out people looking for deals.  It's supposed to be a fun and happy time, but like everything else these Type-A jerks tarnish, they do it to the holidays too.  Their lives wouldn't be complete if they weren't ruining Christmas.
4. The Beach Boys' Christmas song.  There is a line in their Chrismtas song that says "Christmas comes this time each year....".  Huh huh huh....really?  I didn't know that!  It comes every year?  It's so retarded.  It is the dumbest song and what's worse is that he sings it like Forrest Gump too.  I'll post a link at the bottom.
5. Traffic.  Enough said.
6. I miss my family.  None of my family lives here.  It upsets me sometimes.

Here are the reasons I am looking forward to Christmas:

1. My kids' happiness and excitement.  Watching them is wonderful.  It's so satisfying to see your children genuinely happy.
2. Christmas movies.
3. Wham.....ok, I talk about this every year.  This is my favorite Christmas song ever.  It is so cheesy and wonderful and I love it.  Here's the link to Last Christmas, WHAM.  It reminds me of when I was a little girl.  http://youtu.be/60obcSGXAHQ
4. Midnight Mass. 

Here's the link to Little Saint Nick.  Christmas comes this time each year.  Huh huh huh huh, omg!  So does my birthday! huh huh huh huh

http://youtu.be/gU_GsIKxse0

Stranger than Sketch Comedy

Have you ever come across a person who seems like a parody of themselves?  You know the moment I'm talking about....when you realize that you aren't on the set of Saturday Night Live, but that the person in front of you is real and that Ashton Kutcher isn't about to jump out and tell you that you just got Punked?  (That was so 10 years ago, by the way.) 

There is a lady in my Zumba class whom I have refrained from writing about because it seems cruel, but I can't help it now, so this means that you either get to enjoy hearing me make fun of her or you get to call me a mean bitch.

There is probably no way that I can even begin to describe this person without sounding like I am exaggerating, but I am going to try.  She's probably 50,  she looks like she injected MSG directly into the skin underneath her eyes, she's of Asian descent, she wears see-through shiny pants (that show her thong) and I swear there's a tramp stamp on her right wrinkled butt cheek.  I know I saw it.  I looked to others for confirmation, but none of the girls I was standing with wanted to look; they said it was too gross.  I was mesmerized.  I look at her like she's one of those 6-foot contortionists who can stuff themselves into a glass box.  Mesmerizing.  I have never seen anyone so bizarre and I wonder how it happened.

Anyway, she stands in front of the class and dances and shouts, but, see, this is where I can't explain it.  It's the most painful "dancing" I have ever seen, and what's worse than her spastic gyrations is the fact that she goes up to people and practically humps them.  She floats around the room and goes in the opposite direction from the rest of us and to this blonde right here, it makes me confuse my right from my left.  She is flat-out distracting and it takes every morsel of strength that I can possibly muster to keep from laughing.  I swear to you, if she humps me, I am kicking her in her tramp stamp.  I'm guessing it's a butterfly.

So let's talk about Saturday.  We do this cute line dance to a song about going to Louisiana.  It's similar to the Cupid Shuffle.  I work for a Louisiana-style restaurant and I am in charge of the social media, including our Facebook page. I thought "how cute would it be to post this dance on our page?  Henry LOVES videos."  So I talked to my friends in the class about doing it and one of my friends said "Don't let the weird lady hear you or she'll try to be in it!"  Ok, seriously, I am not doing this lady justice.  If I posted her, everyone would think that it was a joke and that the restaurant was making fun of her.  I'm totally serious.  It's that bad.  So I walk over to the teacher and try to be discreet.  I talked to her and the lady heard me.  She was like PUMPED.  I mean pumped, man.  She was GUNG ho, going Gangnam Style.  So what did this mean girl do? (I mean me.)  I cut her out.  I turned my entire body in front of her, cutting her out of the conversation I was having with the teacher.  You know what she did?  She called me out!  She said "Excuse me!  I am in this conversation too!" She wiggled back into the conversation.  On one hand, good for her for sticking up for herself, I was really being a bitch.  But then again, really? You just invited yourself into this conversation and I wasn't inviting you to be filmed for a video, which was my idea, for MY job.  Do you work there?  No.  Over my lifeless body will you participate.  Yes, I was being a mean girl, but she shouldn't assume that I want her to participate. I surely don't want her humping people in the video.  I don't think that it would be in good taste.  Anyway, I turned to the teacher and said "Never mind.  Can I get your number and we'll plan another time to do it?"  The teacher said yes and I got her number.  One of my friends in the class said she has a plan for if the crazy lady shows up.  She said that she's going to say "You have to sign a waiver, and she doesn't have anymore, so sorry."

It's like the 4th grade all over again except we're excluding a crazy old lady who humps people, wears see-through clothing and dances spastically to Pit Bull. 

Sweetness from 1997

My friend, Katie, asked me for my email address this morning and I just now checked it.  She found a speech she had written for speech class in 1997, which would have made us sophomores I think.

It is funny and so sweet; I had to post it.

 

Isn't that so awesome?  It's like I died and got to see what someone would say behind my back, but I didn't die and I get to read it.  Awesome, Katie.  I'm glad I taught you such important things and that I am such a jackass that it's always entertaining.  HAHA!  Love you!

-Britt

Weekend Recap

It is very cold this morning and I still ordered iced coffee so I could get it into my system as quickly as possible.  Why?  I slept for two hours last night.  I should have just injected it into my veins.  UGH, and you wanna know why I slept for two hours?  Because I didn't work out.  I have to work out, otherwise I lay there, wide awake.  I do that anyway to a certain degree, but it's worse when I don't work out. 

SO....the freakin' weekend....Friday night I went to the gym, ate dinner, and read a book.  I forced myself to go to bed at a decent time.  Saturday morning I woke up and felt awesome.  I made breakfast, went to Zumba and went shopping with Kerri because she had to get a dress for the wedding we were going to that night.  Our friend, Lauren, was getting married. 

I'll post some pictures, but first I have to talk about this wedding.  It was really beautiful, first of all.  But what I really want to talk about is the pool.   In the back there was a tent and heaters.  The pool kind of curved around and merged into the tent a bit.  We were all talking about how we thought that someone would fall in by the end of the night, but we had no idea....

We were all in the tent, listening to the heart-warming speeches when "SPLASHHHHH".  Everyone gasped and turned around.  We had a feeling it would happen, but then again, we couldn't believe that it had actually happened.  We definitely thought that it would happen at the end of the night when alcohol could be the culprit.  No such luck.  The poor girl who fell in was one of the bride's best friends and she was in a beautiful cream dress.  She thought she could maneuver around someone and she misjudged.  She laughed when they pulled her out, but we all felt terrible for her.  HER BAG was soaked!!!  She came back out dry, even her bag, and I have no idea how they achieved that.  My friend, Kerri, said it was like she went through a Jetson's clothes changer.

Mikey and Tony

Kerri, Ms. Diva, (heehee, aka Chardon) and me

Me, Kerri, and Crystalle

Me and Crystalle at Donavan's after the wedding

Lauren, the beautiful bride

One cute couple

Yesterday I got stuff done and rested.  Last night a couple of my adorable hostesses, Ashleigh and Jamie, came over to watch "Mean Girls" and eat pizza with me and Lindsey while the boys played with cars.  They love my kids and Lindsey adores them.  She's so cute.  She texts Ashleigh; Ashleigh is 19.  I think it's good for her to have an outlet other than mom. 

That was pretty much my weekend for the most part.

Back to work.